Page 59 of Noah

"I almost had a meltdown at Mom's. Charlie didn't even do anything wrong. Just brought shit up that has been crowding up my head. Most days, I go through life not thinking about the fact I'm on the spectrum. I'm just out there living my life like everyone else. When I started telling people about you, it's one of the first things they'd ask. Does Noah know you're on the spectrum? It's making me crazy. It shouldn't even matter. I mean, I know it does … but it shouldn't."

I stopped to breathe.

Noah reached across the table. I sighed and took his hand. The warmth of it immediately soothed me. He leaned forward and rested his other arm on the table.

He didn't speak.

"Sometimes, my emotions become a bit too much," I continued. "Then it's like they start leaking out of my ears. My brain starts to buzz, I feel faint, and then I lose my shit."

"Okay."

I frowned at him. "How can you just say okay?"

"Because I'm here for you no matter what." He reached his other hand forward and encased mine with it, cradling me in both hands. "Not sure if you felt it last night, but I feel like something shifted when I was down on my knees. It wasn't just my body aching for you … it went deeper than that. I felt like we came to an agreement … a commitment with one another."

I nodded. "I felt it too."

Noah smiled at me. "Good. I'm not going crazy. I've been driving Liam insane all night second guessing myself. And then when you said you weren't coming into the pub, I wondered."

"Wondered what?"

"If you'd felt it too. If it had scared you. If I was setting myself up for heartache."

My pulse surged. Heartache. Were we there yet? I couldn't imagine losing Noah now. So many puzzle pieces had snapped into place in the time we'd spent together. Large and small pieces. Oddly shaped ones. Ones that looked like they'd never find a home because the colours didn't appear to be shared by any around them. Noah had become those matching pieces for me.

"It didn't scare me."

"Me either." Noah squeezed my hand. "I want you to be my boyfriend."

My arms seriously went numb. Shoulders to wrists. If Noah hadn't been holding my hand, I would have sworn it disappeared. The other one felt like a dead tingling weight.

I was shocked.

Noah, an incredible, beautiful man wanted to claim me regardless of my faults. Noah, a perfectionist, saw me and thought I was worthy of his commitment.

The best I could do was nod.

The grin he gave me sealed some of those puzzle pieces together in my heart.

Sent me tumbling hard.

Saturday morning, I awoke as Noah's boyfriend. The title made me feel warm and cozy inside. I liked being his. After our conversation, Noah had taken off back to the pub to finish up the night. He was stuck closing, and I was too exhausted to stay awake any later.

I rolled toward my bedside table, my phone ringing, and grabbed it.

Rainbow Centre.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Brody, it's Jamal. Just wanted to let you know your police record check came back and you're all good to start volunteering."

After my last visit to the Rainbow Centre, I drove to the police station and filled out the necessary paperwork for them to do a record check and send the results to the centre.

"Can I start today?" I knew Noah would be there. It was one of the things we had discussed last night over pie, that I had applied to be a volunteer at the centre. Noah had been thrilled.

"Of course. Always lots of kids here on the weekend and Kyle will be here."

"I'll come in at two like Noah."