I reach for the coffee cup and take a sip. It’s still lukewarm enough and hits just right.
“I’m just glad for some fucking good news for once,” I mumble against the plastic lid and the dead silence that greets me has my stomach dropping.
“So you haven’t heard then?”
Returning the cup to the table, I run a thumb beneath my nose and purse my lips. Because that’s the other reason I had to call. “I … have, actually.”
Guess it’s bad news time.
“And it’s not good news.” Anna doesn’t even have to ask to know. She’s already sighing a breath of defeat over the line.
“He’s not ready to come home yet, Anna.”
A sound that’s awfully familiar to a broken heart fills the line only moments before she covers it up with a clearing of her throat.
She thinks I don’t know, but I do.
“As long as he’s getting what he needs,” she mutters, but it’s forced. Just as it was the last time I told her that Toby opted to sign himself up for another program at the rehab clinic he was court-ordered to attend.
He was only supposed to be gone a week. Get a detox. Come home.
The man fought us tooth and fucking nail the entire way there, to the point where his mug ended up on the front page of the tabloids for being a drunk on his way to rehab.
Least creative headline ever.
But as of this morning, he’s enrolled himself in the facility’s most immersive program available.
“How long?”
“Ninety days.”
For so long, I thought Toby was just like the rest of us. Having a drink, a good fucking time, no big deal.
I still don’t know all the demons that hide in his closet, possibly never will, but if I’d been able to put two and two together without Anna having to basically threaten me to see it …
It took her breaking down in front of me while holding a phone that played yet another viral video of our dearest troublemaker destroying the inside of a liquor store with his bare hands and only little Anna there to stop him.
I’m still raw from it all.
That the biggest demon hiding in one of my best friend’s closet was alcoholism.
And I had no fucking clue.
In fact, I encouraged the shit on more than one occasion. And for that, I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive myself, let alone ask for Toby’s forgiveness.
I know I don’t deserve it.
So when the man from the clinic that’s sponsoring Toby called and gave me the news … I knew the only option I had was to agree.
Give him what he needs.
“That’s … a long time.”
Clearing the lump from my throat, I blink a few times to break myself out of my thoughts and come back to the phone. “Yeah. The guy said he was going to email me the itinerary for the program. I guess they have already mapped out a few things.”
“That’s … good …” Anna breathes into the phone, barely audible.
I sigh and switch the phone to my other ear. “I know it sucks, Anna. You don’t have to pretend with me.”