Page 111 of Anything To Be With You

I walk back out and Dani's cheek turn pink as she eyes me, biting her plump bottom lip.

I drop to my knees in front of her, taking her small hands in mine. "I’m begging here, Sweetheart. On my knees. In a pair of gray sweatpants. My best lingerie. Take some time off. Please." I bat my lashes at her and pout.

Dani snorts out a laugh, bending down and kissing my forehead. "You make a compelling argument, Archer, but fine, I'll take two weeks off."

I stand, smiling down at the woman I love. "Thank you, Sweetheart."

Dani

"I haven’t done this in years." I admit to Dr. Walters. "I’m a bit nervous." I twist my purse strap in my hands.

I had called to see if she was taking on new patience's and booked an appointment with her for Wednesday morning after Luke dropped me off Monday on his way to work and before Mom took me into the station to press charges against Josh.

She smiles softly, sitting back in her chair. "I’m not going to push you to tell me everything that has happened, Dani. I’m here to listen. If you want to sit here in silence for the hour, I’m fine with that. If you’d like to talk about your day, I’m fine with that as well. We go at your pace, not mine."

I relax against the back of the chair. The last therapist I saw pushed for information. He was constantly asking me questions about how I viewed myself, what I thought when I looked in the mirror and saw all my scars. He never touched on my relationship with Josh, he completely ignored it when I would bring it up and it made me feel worse, not better. I told my parents after a month of seeing him and they found me someone else.

But she wasn’t any better.

"I’d like to talk about my…relationship with Josh." I mutter.

"What would you like to talk about?"

I looked around the office. "I don’t know, to be honest. There are so many things I want to talk about."

Dr. Walters smiles. "That’s okay, take your time."

"Well, there is one thing that has always been a mystery to me," I say, sitting back against the chair. "Why did he pick me? I wasn't one of the popular kids. I didn't play sports or smoke weed. My family wasn't rich, but we never went without either and our house was a simple bungalow in one of Toronto's older neighbourhoods. I didn't fit in with him and his friends, I didn't even think I was on his radar, and yet, he picked me."

Dr. Walters crosses her leg over her knee and sits back. "From what I've gathered about your relationship with Josh from your assessment, it seems to me that he has narcissistic personality disorder. The love bombing, the gaslighting, the manipulation and the anger are all traits of narcissistic behaviour, along with being self-centered, lacking empathy and his need for attention and recognition.

"They choose people who are either strong-willed and have characteristics they admire because they believe they will also get the praise or who are forgiving and caring because they know they'll be able to get away with anything. However, without proper diagnoses it's hard to say. He could just be an asshole spoiled brat that is used to getting his own way. Tell me how your relationship started with him."

I spend the rest of my session going over my relationship with Dr. Walters. She listens quietly, only interrupting when she has a question or has something to say. At the end of our session, I feel drained, emotionally and mentally. It was a lot, but she gave me a few things to think about and some homework to do. I am to keep a journal for the next week and write down my feelings whenever Josh comes to mind for us to discuss next week.

This is going to be the hardest week of my life, but it will all be worth it if I can move on from the power Josh still holds over me.

Stubborn Ass

Dani

Luke showed up at eight in the morning. I told him that my two weeks were up and I was ready to come back to work. After fighting for half an hour, we came to a compromise. I can come back to work, however I work from home for another few weeks. He said until the doctor clears me, I'm not to step foot into the office.

Stubborn ass.

My stitches have been removed and my bruises are fading, I feel better than I did. I booked an appointment for Tuesday, I'm going stir crazy sitting at home and Mason is driving me bonkers.

"I said after ten. You hard of hearing," I grunt in way of greeting.

"I’m hard for something," he mutters, and I snort.

"Why are you even up this early? It’s Saturday." I give him a quick kiss and walk towards the kitchen with Luke in tow.

"I haven’t slept yet," Luke places the bag he’s carrying on the table. "I’ve been working on the case."

"Still." I drop into a chair.

"Yeah. John keeps 'finding' more evidence against Joni."

---