Page 76 of Strictly Forbidden

Max as usual had no issue bounding into the room, jumping onto my lap on the chair. Even though the sweet dog licked my face, I kept my gaze locked on her face.

“You really aren’t going to change. Are you?” she asked after what seemed like a lengthy period of time had passed.

“I have business to finish, Noel. Just because I was given a second chance at life doesn’t mean I can let what happened go.”

Her jaw clenched and she looked away briefly, staring at nothing. “When I escaped from the monster, I had visions of driving a stake through his heart. It was all I could think about for a long time, my dreams filled with ways of hunting and trapping him, but I realized after some reflective time and speaking with my therapist that getting revenge wasn’t good for me. Or my mental stability. As he told me, all it would do was drive me into being the same kind of person as the one who’d hurt me. It did take me a little while dealing with the horror and the vengeful feelings, but I finally realized that while I’d get a few minutes or a couple days of satisfaction after killing the man, it wouldn’t take away the horror of what I’d been forced to deal with. Maybe you should try and remember that.”

Her stare was pointed, her eyes imploring, and I’ll be damned if I didn’t want to be a much better man at that very moment.

However, as usual, I couldn’t determine what I could say that would change anything.

“Fine. I’m getting a hot bath and drinking an entire bottle of wine myself. Any chance you’ll figure out a way to play some music for a change? Don’t worry. I’m not looking for anything romantic. I realized you don’t have that bone in your body. Maybe a little heavy metal music, screamers. That might ease both our demons or feed them with what they need for now. Who knows.”

She’d turned bitter and I hated that for her. It was something else I had to blame myself for. Fantastic, the list was growing. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Don’t stress yourself out. My wishes mean nothing and I get that. By the way, if you plan on keeping me and Max here as your prisoners much longer, both of us will need food. Just something for you to keep in the back of your mind.”

“Yeah, I will.” Why argue with her that she wasn’t my prisoner all over again? She wouldn’t believe anything I said. Why should she?

“Sure you will.” Her face suddenly softened briefly, her eyes even twinkling for just a couple of precious seconds. “So, um… You can come with me if you want. The bathtub is big enough for two.” The look on her face was slightly hopeful but since I didn’t respond right away, she shut completely down as I’d done before. “Right. I get it. Have a groovy night.”

Groovy.

Just seeing her face was enough to remind me of everything I wanted.

And everything I was forcing myself to miss out on.

I was a fucking asshole. More so than I’d admitted to before.

As she spun around, Max immediately following, I slunk back in my chair, suddenly hating not only myself but my life as well.

The man I’d turned into wasn’t anything like what I’d imagined.

I’d become the hunter, the killer.

And the monster.

CHAPTER 21

Noel

Men.

I’d finally come to the conclusion most of them were insufferable.

“Fuck him, Max. Fuck. Him.”

Max whined to say I was wrong.

“I’m not wrong. Kage wants nothing to do with me, except under the sheets.” I was ready to stamp my foot out of frustration as if I was five years old. Way to go, girl. Perfect. Act like an adult.

Kage was more than frustrating with his constant scowl and the fact he hadn’t shaved the entire time we’d been at the cabin. His beard had to be sexy of course, and the fact I’d always thought men were sexier with beards and mustaches was as irritating as the man.

Overhearing the man’s determination to track, hunt, and kill the person or persons responsible for his family’s deaths had caused a twofold mental response.

I’d wanted to pick up a spear and go with him on the hunt. That had been my first thought. But the man who’d laughed as if nothing could bother him while tossing snowballs didn’t deserve to be labeled a killer. I felt it in every muscle, every blood cell.

Which meant my second thought had been to be angry with him.