Page 88 of Devious Knight

I nearly did.

If Ms. Minchin hadn’t interrupted I know I would have been buried deep inside her by now.

I would have been Isabelle’s first.

The sudden realization makes me loosen my grip on her wrist. Her eyes fill with that loathing determination and she seizes the opportunity to flee.

I keep watching her running away from me.

This is the first time that I’ve felt I should let her go. The remnants of my humanity tell me to not just let her go, but also to leave her alone.

Maybe I’ve done enough by ruining her chances to go to Cambridge this year.

I was right about her innocent nature. So was Thorne.

He said there are some girls you don’t touch. She’s one of them.

He couldn’t have put it better.

As I watch her I know that even with my personal vendetta against her, she deserves better than me.

Even Michael with his drug rep would be better than me.

That asshole is the good, clean-cut guy on the outside, but he’s secretly into wild hard shit most people wouldn’t touch. That might be how he maintains his mask of perfection.

It’s funny. Weeks ago, when I threatened to expose his ass for taking heroin and other performance shit if he didn’t cancel his date with Isabelle, I thought I was the better man. I genuinely didn’t want her getting involved with a guy who's into drugs.

I don’t take drugs but I’m evil in other ways.

I entertain the thought of leaving her alone for all of one minute—maybe not even that—until the devious devil inside me reclaims my mind and squashes the idea like a bug.

The girl I want is now a woman and she’s a virgin. I’d be the first man to have her. The first man to own her body and make her bleed.

I’d be the first to take something from her that I can’t give back.

I’d be her first.

I can’t think of anything better than that, even if it crosses every line and ruins me.

The image of her naked body in my mind reminds me that I still want her.

But now I want it all.

All of her.

Chapter Twenty-One

Isabelle

Today will not be like yesterday.

I am determined to be okay…

I repeat that mantra in my mind over and over again as I walk down the wide corridor of Freya’s Hall. I’m here for the Theta fundraiser luncheon.

My great-aunt Liza believed that if you tell yourself something enough times, you’d make it come true. Sure, Aunt Liza also believed she could fly and that she was the incarnate of a Viking princess, but she was always happy.

She lived to be a hundred and five and was married to the same man for over sixty years. She also had enough children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren to start a small country. So she must have done something right.

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