Page 115 of Devious Knight

The unsettling thought sends a cold wave of anxiety racing through my chest like water breaking through a damn.

My heart picks up with every step I take toward his office, each beat coming quicker, a steady drumroll that doesn’t match the pace of my breathing.

I try to focus, try to calm down, but my thoughts are racing—darting from one worry to the next.

I’m crazy for thinking about anything other than Parker, but Kade never left my mind. He rarely does, but last night was different to any other.

His words bounced around in my head, pushing me back to the crux of our problems—the thing I did to him.

I thought I was okay with riding out the situation without knowing, but now I’m not so sure. The closer we get, the more I want to know what I did to him.

Part of me—the part that’s slowly growing attached to him and can’t deny our attraction—wants a chance to fix it.

That part of me savored his walk down memory lane back to the first day we met.

That part of me thinks if I know what I did and I fix it, I might be able to figure him out without the vendetta he has against me. Then maybe we could just be those two people from the past.

I’m not sure if such a thing is possible. Or if I should want it.

Kade is still the guy I need to stay away from because he’ll hurt me.

All thoughts of him stall in my mind and shelve themselves when I turn the corner and see Parker’s door ahead.

My soul trembles, and the weight in my stomach grows, feeling like a bolder, heavy and unmoving. My steps slow, but I will myself to keep going.

I can do this. I will be okay…

I’m attempting to summon Aunt Liza again. It worked at the fundraiser. But not so much now.

Back then, I was just worried about Kade. Now I’m facing the man who I believe wanted my mother dead.

Of course, I would feel like the world has shifted and I’m desperately clinging to the edge, trying not to fall off the face of the Earth.

I reach the door, breathe deeply, then knock.

“Come in,” Parker calls out, and my mind holds on to the sound of his voice. The tone, the words, the cadence.

Was that the voice I heard that night?

Was it his?

I was twelve, terrified, and I thought I was going to die. I could have gotten it wrong. Did I?

My heart tells me it was him, but like Dad said, there’s no evidence.

I think past the tightness in my brain and open the door, praying to whoever will listen that I won’t fall apart.

When I walk into the office, the first thing I notice is how different it feels. And it’s been redecorated. The pictures and certificates of achievements are all gone, and the wall is bare. All traces of Chancellor Potalov have been removed as if he was never here.

Two more steps in, past the wall of bookshelves, and I find Parker sitting behind the desk—Chancellor Potalov’s old desk.

The ropes around my chest tighten, but at least I hold it together.

Parker’s dark brown eyes meet mine with a blank face and a calm demure.

“Good morning, Chancellor Federov,” I manage.

“Morning. Please, take a seat.” He gestures to the chair in front of the desk.

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