Page 45 of Small Town CEO Grump

I felt the sun on my face and I rolled over onto my side, not wanting to open my eyes. I had slept so well, and I felt as if everything that had happened the night before had been a dream.

I could still feel Ryan’s lips against mine, and I remembered every bit of his gentle touch and the kind and tender words he had spoken.

The date had gone better than I had even thought that it would, and I also realized that I cared for him far more deeply than I was willing to admit.

I reluctantly opened my eyes, looked at the clock, and realized that it was time for me to start my day. I was going to have breakfast with my parents, pick up Tyler, and then he and I were going to go to the park to play catch.

However, before any of that I knew that there was a conversation that I had to have with Ryan. I wasn’t looking forward to it because I knew that there was a chance that it wouldn’t go well, but I also knew that I didn’t want to put it off any longer.

I got out of bed and went into the kitchen to make some coffee. Once it was ready I poured myself a cup, grabbed my phone, and went and sat outside on my deck.

I stared at my phone for a minute, trying to figure out what I was going to say. I decided that I would finish my first cup of coffee, and then I would call him. I knew he woke up early every morning, and so I wasn’t afraid of waking him. I was just nervous to make the call.

Once I had finished the first cup and refilled my mug, I took a deep breath and picked up my phone. It was time to get it over with.

Ryan answered after the first ring, and I could hear in his voice that he was happy to hear from me.

“Hey,” he said. “I was just thinking about you. How are you?”

“I’m good,” I said. “How about you?”

“Very good. Just enjoying coffee and getting ready for my day. What about you?”

“I’m doing the same thing,” I said.

“Is something going on?” he asked. “You sound like you have something on your mind.”

Once again, I was amazed at how well he knew me. I wasn’t going to play games with him, and so I decided to be as direct as possible.

“Yes, there is something on my mind, I said. “So I wanted to talk to you about it.”

“Do you want to talk over the phone? Or do you want me to come over so we can talk in person?”

I knew that if he was in front of me, I probably wouldn’t be able to talk as openly. I still felt giddy and nervous around him at times, and I knew I needed to be able to think clearly.

“If it’s okay with you, I would rather talk on the phone.”

“That works,” he said. “So what’s going on?”

“Well, I had a great time on the date last night. You know that. And I know that you did too. I loved every minute of it, from the time you picked me up until you dropped me off.”

“I’m glad you said that,” he said. “Because I also enjoyed every minute of it.”

“I’m glad. And I don’t know if it’s too soon to have this conversation, but I also know that I need to have this conversation sooner rather than later, given my life and my situation.”

“All right,” Ryan said, his voice steady and soothing. “I’m listening.”

“You know I don’t date,” I said, taking a deep breath. “I told you that last night. You are the first guy I’ve been on a date with in what feels like forever. But I also can’t date. I mean I can’t be a casual dater. So I know it seems early, and it might be too intense, but I need to know what you’re thinking, and what you view this all as. Because, unless you could consider this to be something that would become permanent, I can’t keep moving forward. I’m not saying we need to get engaged right now, or even really talk about that, but if you know, right now that that’s not even a possibility or not even something that you would ever want, please tell me now because I don’t want just casual dating.”

Ryan cleared his throat. “I see,” he said.

“Yeah, I mean, again, I know that this is early. But I’m also looking out for Tyler. He knows you as his coach, but if I’m going to date you, or have you be my fella, then he’s going to know it, and I need to know that it’s serious.”

I could hear Ryan chuckle, and I felt good to know that he was being lighthearted about it. I was hoping I hadn’t scared him off.

“Did you say fella?” he asked, his voice teasing.

“Yes,” I said, laughing at myself. “I said fella.”

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