Page 65 of Fragments of You

“Funny enough, your mom said something similar to me the first time I visited. I wasn’t aware they had told you that I had stopped by.”

“They didn’t. My sister told Felix.”

“I wasn’t aware your sister and Felix still spoke.”

“He’s my fiancé. Of course they speak.”

He tries to hide the flinch that tugs at his features at the word fiancé, but I still catch it. I briefly consider what that would be like if the roles were reversed. How would I feel hearing him refer to someone in such a way? I’m quick to push away the sudden panic that floods my gut.

“It would make for rather awkward get-togethers if they didn’t,” I finally finish, trying not to let the direction of my thoughts show on my face.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?”

“I just didn’t realize they were close.”

“They aren’t. She said it as a way to hurt us.”

“Us?”

“Please... Celine doesn’t miss an opportunity to rub something in my face she knows will bother me. The fact that my parents were seeing the enemy behind my back... Oh, she just couldn’t wait to throw that in Felix’s and my faces the first chance she got.”

“So I’m the enemy now?”

“Not to be mean, but yes, you kind of are. You’re the one who imploded my entire life. What title did you expect I’d give you?”

“I don’t know... Not the enemy.” He pulls his hat off his head, smoothing back his hair before putting it back into place. “I can stop visiting them if that’s what you want.”

“That would be unfair to my parents. I know how happy they both are that you’re back. But it’s hard for Felix because they’ve never truly accepted him.”

“Have you ever stopped to ask yourself why that is?”

“I already know why,” I’m quick to say. “It’s because when they look at him, all they see is the party boy he was in high school. They see the girls and the booze and all the trouble he caused, and they just assume he’s the same person as he was back then. To be clear, he isn’t. Far from it actually. Losing his mom changed him in a profound way. Losing you changed him too.”

“Funny, he didn’t seem all that changed to me,” he sneers.

“That’s because he doesn’t let you see the real him. Why would he? You’re threatening everything he holds dear.”

“Everything he holds dear, he stole from me.” His nostrils flare with aggravation.

“You mean, he pieced back together everything you shattered and threw away. He stole nothing. You practically handed me right to him. He doesn’t deserve this. He doesn’t deserve to pay the price for someone else’s mistakes.”

“You speak as if he’s not drowning in mistakes of his own.”

“Aren’t we all?” My voice rises as I once again look around the old room, feeling a type of guilt that only happens when you truly know you’re doing something wrong. “I shouldn’t be here.” I take a step backward toward the door. “I love Felix. I want to be with Felix.”

“If that were true, you wouldn’t have come here at all.”

I ignore the voice in my head that says he’s right.

“It’s you. You being here. It’s dredging up all this stuff from the past and I can’t compartmentalize it all.”

“You can blame me all you want, but we both know if Felix were who you truly wanted, my coming back wouldn’t have affected your relationship.” His words hit a spot I didn’t even realize I had been trying to protect.

“I have to go.” I turn, taking off through the house.

I feel Nash close behind me, but I keep going, slowing only to grab my keys and phone before shoving my way outside moments later.

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