Page 43 of Embracing Us

“He is,” I agree. “But of course, I’m biased.”

“That’s part of your job description as his father.” She smiles kindly. “How are you feeling? Ready for your big day?” As I open my mouth to respond, the chattering of voices floats towards us. When I glance in the direction of the noise, Crystal and my aunt are walking across the terrace, both of them dressed in their Sunday best.

“Maxy,” Crystal hollers, as she waddles down the short aisle, her arms open wide. “You both look so handsome. Linda is going to be over the moon you stayed clean too.” I chuckle. “You laugh, but there has never been a truer statement. That woman has been stressing over your shirt all morning.”

My attention moves to my Aunt Susan beside her, the woman who is like a mother to me. The woman I am terrified to lose, now the clock is confirmed to be counting down. It scares me more that she will be lost mentally first. Most likely, the person I adore will be gone but her body will remain for some time after.

“You look beautiful, Auntie,” I tell her. An embarrassed smile plays on her lips, which are glossed a delicate shade of pink to match the simple summer dress she is wearing. “Would you be able to take Jackson? His bag is next to your chair.” The blue nappy bag that contains my son’s various accoutrements sits on the floor next to one of the two cream armchairs that have been moved here for our only guests. My aunt takes Jackson from my arms then sits in her seat. Crystal follows her lead as a man in a dark grey suit nods to the registrar from the doorway.

“I believe your bride is here and ready to marry you,” the registrar says, triggering a harder heartbeat in my chest. The sheer joy of getting to this moment, unbelievable – a day I never thought would happen.

The gentle classical music which has been playing in the background comes to an end. The man in the grey suit takes his position behind the grand piano which sits at the back of the terrace. Familiar notes fill the air as our song, Somewhere Only We Know, becomes the theme. I stand in front of the woman waiting to marry us and look towards the doorway my future wife should appear through.

It is probably only seconds but feels like hours. Doubt flits across my mind – what if she ran? What if she decided this isn’t what she wants in the end, being tied down to another man for life? In reality, we haven’t known each other long. Twelve months of obscene changes meaning both our lives have been altered irreversibly. Then she comes into view, and all my worries evaporate. She’s here.

Big hazel eyes meet mine. I raise my hand to my chin, ensuring my jaw isn’t sitting on the floor. The satin dress glides over her skin, fitted but not clinging to her curves. The neckline is low, showing a glimpse of her breasts but leaving plenty to the imagination. The brown hair I love to have wrapped in my fingers is piled high, stray strands framing her face. Simple flowers decorate her hair, and when I look at her toes, she is wearing delicate gold sandals. As always, her nails are painted a vibrant colour, red on this occasion. It is a feature of her I would miss if she stopped.

Her progress down the aisle is painfully slow. Our only two guests stand, our son in his aunt’s arms. Linda stops when she comes to them, cuddling each one in turn then placing a kiss on Jackson’s forehead. Crystal takes the small bouquet of red roses from her, and Linda turns to me, taking both my hands in hers.

“Hi,” she says, softly.

“Hi.”

We grin at each other idiotically. The registrar clears her throat, causing us both to glance in her direction. But all I want to do is look at Linda, the woman who asked me to marry her. The woman who I found when I least expected it and gave me a child there was no plan to have. The woman I never thought I would find.

“We are gathered here today…” the registrar begins, her voice loud and clear. She speaks as if talking to a full room, not four adults and a baby. We listen but never take our eyes off one another as she talks. Her use of my name brings my attention back to her. “It is time for your vows,” she says simply. I focus back on the woman whose hands I hold, then breathe deeply before the words I’ve rehearsed so many times pass my lips.

“Us.” Linda cocks her head to one side as she listens. “Us is something I never thought I would have. We is a word I never believed I could use in regards to having my person. Then twelve months ago, you dropped into my life at a point much needed, a time when I assumed I was destined to be alone.” Her eyes glisten with unshed tears as she listens to my vow. “I promise to always be there. For you. For Jackson. For us. There will always be we, that is you and I. Until I take my last breath, I promise to worship you, care for you, and be the man you deserve in this world.” She squeezes my hands in hers as a tear rolls down her cheek.

“You tell me often that I saved you. You, Linda, have no idea what happiness you have given me. I have everything I’ve ever wanted because of you. I love you completely and promise to never leave your side until it is my time to leave this earth.”

“Oh, Max,” she whispers, her voice catching on my name. “That was beautiful.” I smile at her, and she shakes her head. “I’m not sure how I am meant to follow that.” My hand lifts to her cheek, stroking the smooth skin.

“Be honest, Beautiful. That’s all we need. Honesty and each other.”

“When we met,” she begins, and I’m acutely aware these are not the vows she prepared. The folded piece of paper is pinched between her fingers. “Our attraction was instantaneous, but so was my love for you. Within days you had stolen my heart, and I knew there was no way it was being returned. Even in our time apart…” She pauses, her eyes dropping to between her feet. “My heart screamed that you were the one for me. You and I were meant to be, as cliché as that statement is.” I chuckle, and she looks up at me. “I love you, that is all you need to know. I love you.”

“Those vows were both unique and beautiful, clearly spoken from the soul,” the registrar says. “Now, we need to do the legal proceedings so you can walk away as Mr and Mrs Gordon.” We both nod at her in unison, then listen on as she speaks the words that will join us together in holy matrimony. “I now pronounce you husband and wife,” she proclaims, and our guests break into applause. Crystal punches the air in excitement. “You may kiss the bride.”

“I thought we would never get to the good bit,” I whisper conspiratorially to Linda. She giggles as my lips lock on to hers, surprising me by pushing her tongue between my teeth and wrapping her arms around my neck. When we break apart, she grins up brightly, her lip gloss smudged. “What a start to married life, Mrs Gordon.”

“There is plenty more where that came from,” she replies with a smirk before we both move and retrieve our son to have our first photos taken as husband and wife.

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