Page 21 of An Endless Memory

Everything Lily told me rebounded inside my head as I rocked Kellan and read a book to Cali in one of the guest rooms. The little girl was tucked under a comforter that had more flowers than any flower beds I’d ever seen.

I’d been on uncle duty before, but there hadn’t been many times I’d flown solo like tonight. And to do it with two kids I barely knew served only to make me wonder how much I’d missed out on with my nieces and nephews.

Cody and his first wife had lived in Buffalo Gully when his oldest two were born. Before she died, his wife had preferred Wilder and Sutton for babysitting. Which had been fine. I’d been younger and not used to kids.

Then Aggie and Ansen had Ro. Cody met Tova and they had Charlie. Aggie and Ansen had Tripp next. Now Sutton and Wilder were having twins, Aggie was expecting again, so was Vienne, and Tova had just announced she was pregnant.

Ten nieces and nephews. How much would I miss in their lives?

I shook it off and turned the page. Cali’s blinks were getting long. Lily had made her change and clean up before she laid herself down. She’d pumped when I promised her I wouldn’t gag when handling a bottle of breast milk. My insistence that I’d handled milk from several animals in my career didn’t comfort her like I had hoped it would. An embarrassed blush had flamed across her cheeks.

I finished the last page of the book. The author was listed as just Magnolia. Cali said it was her grandma. “Time for bed.”

“I sleep with Mommy.”

New house. New town. Was she scared in this strange room? Lily needed sleep. Kellan would be in her room. How much quality rest would Lily get with two kids? Not much, judging by how she’d been out within seconds of driving. “If I check all over your room and make sure it’s safe, can you try falling asleep in your bed first?” It was an old negotiating trick I’d heard Cody use a few times.

Her lips puffed out. “Monsters like to hide under the bed.”

“Whoever told you that don’t know monsters. I heard they’re afraid of kids.” She gave me a dubious look, but I nodded. “Haven’t you watched Monsters, Inc?”

“Watch a movie ’bout monsters?” Her doubtful expression didn’t waver.

“Tell you what, I’ll look anyway. Monsters don’t like me, that’s for darn sure.”

She wearily pulled her blankets up. “Night, Eliot.”

“Night, Cali.”

I glanced down at Kellan. His little lips were smushed against each other. He was snoozing solidly, having fallen asleep during the first book we read, somewhere between when the mouse got a cookie and made a damn mess.

I got up, nestled Kellan in the crook of my elbow, and checked the closet and under the bed. Kellan snoozed through the whole process.

“All clear and I’ll be right outside.” I was about to walk out of the bedroom.

“Eliot?”

I bit back a smile. She mostly said the L sound, but there was a hint of a W in there. She’d probably outgrow it as soon as tomorrow, but that, along with her enthusiasm at seeing me, melted my heart a little more each time I saw her. If kids liked me, then I wasn’t too far gone from civilization, surrounded by isolated men on my big ranch in the middle of nowhere. “Yeah?”

“Can you keep the door open?”

“You got it.” I turned the light off and kept the door halfway open.

The hallway light stayed on, giving Cali some light to go to sleep with and so I could lay Kellan down.

I glanced down at him tucked against my chest, his fingers lax under his chin. I didn’t hold sleeping babies often. I played with them or held them so my siblings and their spouses could eat or visit without a human barnacle.

His little mouth moved like he was suckling an invisible bottle.

Cute little bugger.

Lily’s door was open too. Was she afraid to shut herself completely away from her kids? Duh, of course. We were practically strangers.

Yet, I was marrying her. Within days.

I’d checked the courthouse hours. We could go there Monday, say our vows and this nightmare would be over for her.

Or I could leave. Tell her I couldn’t marry a stranger. She’d understand. She’d been terribly sympathetic and had given me several outs. Yet I had stayed and told her to go to bed. I was a single guy. I never wanted to try and fail at a relationship and prove my mother right, but I could use my bachelorhood for good. I could give it up and help a mom and two kids. And a cat. Add in more barn cats she’d probably care for.

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