Page 7 of An Endless Memory

Cali opened the door and beamed at me. Wanda was behind her. She already had Kellan loaded in his carrier and his diaper bag packed.

“I don’t close at the clinic the rest of the week,” I said by way of apology and explanation. I’d been late three times last week.

Wanda smiled. “How about we give you a month to adjust before late fees set in?”

“I can’t let you do that.” Yet it’d be awesome. Everyone was doing so much for me. I had to take care of myself. I’d relied on my ex-husband and had been left with little more than debt. “I know about the time issue, and I’m late.”

“It’s only a month.” Wanda handed over the car seat. “If this is going to be a regular thing, you’ll be paying enough after that. Give yourself some time to adjust.”

Wasn’t that what Sutton had basically talked to me about? I didn’t have the luxury to adjust. Two kids depended on me to keep it together, and since their father had chosen not to, I was stuck.

Wanda’s kindness burrowed into my stress, easing a small part of it. “Thank you,” I said, my words thick. She shouldn’t have to waive her fees because my life was a mess.

“No worries. I know how it is.”

I didn’t say anything, but Wanda had three grown kids and a husband who seemed to adore her and supported the daycare from what I’d seen. I hadn’t known a supportive husband or one who thought the moon and earth revolved around me. “See you tomorrow.”

She might regret the month of no extra fees. The rest of the week, I’d be at her door the minute she opened in the morning. I would dump the kids on her and run to work. I might not be paying ten dollars for every five minutes I was late to daycare, but I’d be showing up to work five to ten minutes late instead. If there were limits to how understanding my boss could be, I might, unfortunately, find them.

I hated to lose Wanda, but I’d have to find a new daycare. I couldn’t risk my job, and I couldn’t hemorrhage money because of my hours.

I hefted the diaper bag over my shoulder and gripped the car seat.

Cali slipped her hand into my free one. “What’s for dinner?”

“Uh…sandwiches?”

She groaned. “Always samwiches.”

“I know.”

Grandma’s house was five miles out of town. Technically, her address was Coal Haven and all her land was in Coal Haven, which was nine miles from Crocus Valley. She’d be dismayed I worked in Crocus Valley instead of in the town she loved, but there weren’t many other vet clinics in the area. The only other vet clinic was run by a notorious womanizer, and I’d already been there and done that with someone like him and had the newborn and divorce papers to show for it.

It didn’t matter if I worked in Coal Haven or Crocus Valley. The cost of living in either one was cheaper than in a bigger town.

I coasted down the long drive that had grass poking between the wheel divots. It needed more gravel, but that went way down my growing list of shit to get done. Cats darted in the door I kept cracked in the barn. The barn cats were half-feral. Later this summer, I’d trap them and take advantage of the employee discount for neutering and spaying.

The proud farmhouse sat in an L of trees that were three rows of pine, ash, and bushy lilacs. I barely registered them blooming. It was early June and they were my favorite blossoms. Grandma’s too. She couldn’t enjoy them this year; I should be.

A month had passed, but my dad said it was no issue if I moved into her house. Grandma had told me she was leaving me the house and the forty acres it sat on. The rest of the land and property would be split among my siblings. My dad’s sole sibling hadn’t had any kids. We assumed Aunt Linda would get the money from the estate. My parents were doing well enough since my dad was the CEO of King Oil in Billings.

Go home and be dependent on your parents like you were with me. My ex’s words were poison.

I got closer and noticed a silver car parked by the garage. It was vaguely familiar. I pulled into the detached garage. By the time I got out, my aunt Linda was hovering by the silver car, her face pinched. Her husband, Darren, got out from the driver’s seat. I didn’t expect them to visit this soon after I’d moved in. Or ever.

“Hi.” Aunt Linda and I had never been close, but there was no animosity between us. She hadn’t seemed to know what to do in a house bustling with six kids, and Darren just ignored us.

She smiled, but the tension around her eyes remained. The fine material of her skirt wrapped around her legs in the wind. All my life, she’d worn floral dresses and put her hair back in a twist. “We need to talk.”

Another person tracked me down to talk? Was she worried like my boss was? Did she feel bad that she lived in town and hadn’t stopped in yet?

“Sure.” I got Kellan’s baby carrier out. Cali crawled out the same door and hid behind my legs. “Come inside.”

I led them to the side door that faced the garage. Inside, the smell of Grandma’s lavender perfume still lingered, bringing comfort. The main difference was there were no longer the savory scents of a delicious meal cooking or the sweet smell of a fresh pie or cookies. If life slowed down, I’d make some cookies with Cali.

I’d have to get a little more sleep before I could tackle a real meal.

Just being home caused the fatigue to settle heavily on my shoulders as if my body sensed a bed nearby. I didn’t sleep in Grandma’s bed. Her mattress was older than me, and the guest bedrooms were less worn. I had moved into one and squashed the bassinet in the corner. Cali often slept with me, too, until she got used to her own room. As if my sleep wasn’t terrible already. To top it off, I often ended up in the second guest room to keep Kellan from waking up Cali.

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