Page 3 of Null & Void

The Silent Assassin title started circulating about a decade past, and at that time, no one knew it was me. Jaena had me doing jobs long before my coming-of-age, knowing that as a Null, an announcement wouldn’t be posted for the other five countries to make a bid to purchase me.

It became a game to me. How quietly could I assassinate someone? I got cocky, making sure other people were home, or doing it in public. I never once had a close call.

The only times I've ever had to physically defend myself was while traveling to and from my destinations, and mercenaries or skin traders saw me as an easy mark. Some were smart enough to wonder why a lone woman would be traveling, or what Gift I might have because of these violet eyes marking me as a Patron of the Divine.

Most of the time they were just idiots, and I was able to take out another group of scum from this difficult world.

CHAPTER TWO

Informing the children went about as well as I expected. The younger ones don’t really understand yet, but I’ve known some of the older kids their entire lives, and their devastated faces made it all the worse.

You’d think being the Silent Assassin, I would’ve gotten a work assignment literally anywhere else, but I like it. These kids aren’t afraid of me. They don’t know the things I’ve done. Their unfiltered opinions and attitudes are usually the best part of my day, and they don’t hold back which never fails to make me laugh.

We spend the day tending to our herb garden, making new ferments and pastes, and cooking meals together. I've always wanted the kids to feel like they could survive by relying on themselves. Teaching them about the plants they can forage to feed their bellies and heal what ails them. How much of it stays with them, I don’t know, but their flushed cheeks and filthy smiling faces tell me they’re having a good time.

I remain upbeat with them despite the truth. While it may be wrong to give them a false sense of what our world is really like, it also seems unnecessarily cruel to add more fear and uncertainty to their lives.

Most kids manifest their Gift before they age-up and move to secondary housing the season they turn thirteen. A lot of what we do here in the children’s compound is about managing their Gifts. Some nannies are specifically tasked with encouraging Gifts to manifest through testing and trying to trigger something.

Obvious Gifts like an increase of abilities that already exist—strength, hearing, taste, vision—are easy and usually the first to manifest. Children whose Gifts don’t manifest until they’re in a unique situation and they feel the pull, are slightly more difficult. Healers tend to be like this, with most of them manifesting after they’ve aged-up into secondary.

Like me, some never feel the pull.

The children I nanny are all Junkies. Their Gifts are considered useless and they’re unlikely to be sold—if they are announced at all—in their coming-of-age, during the season they turn twenty-one.

One five-rev-old Nemorisborn kid can change the color of all the hair on his body. Hilarious and fun for a child, but useless to the monarchies paying gold for Gifts. Though Nemoris will surely still make a bid, as they do for anyone born of the forest.

Farra, a twelve-rev-old Mievaborn girl, is about to age-up. She knows she’s a Junky and will likely stay in Osraed forever as all she can do is make her fingernails grow at will. The news that I’m leaving is particularly hard on her. Being the oldest kid, she’s been my right hand for moons. I know she’s trying to be brave, but the devastation on her face is unmistakable.

I knew today would be hard.

Pulling Farra aside before I leave for the day, I hand her a small parcel. “I was going to give you this when you aged-up, but I won’t be here for that now. Don’t open it until then!” I order, playfully poking her ribs while she bats me away.

She gives me a tight hug and then sniffles her way back to her dorm. She’ll open it the moment she leaves my sight. I hope she loves the book on wild, edible, and medicinal plants across the Divine world. It’s full of beautiful diagrams of plant stages, their uses, and how to prepare them. I’ll miss her bright and sassy personality. I do not doubt she will thrive, even as a Junky.

As I’m leaving, I run into a woman I grew up with, a Gifted wet nurse. Some Gifted stay in Osraed simply because their Gifts are of use to the council, and Petia is one such Patron. I absolutely detest her, and the familiar flutter of rage in my chest becomes rampant the moment I hear her voice.

“Mika. What a pleasant surprise to see you on this side of the compound,” Petia says acerbically. A couple of other Patrons look over at us and then dash away, leaving me alone with Petia in the small receiving room off the hallway.

Around us are soft chairs, small tables, and a dresser with a pitcher of water and glasses—everything a grieving parent needs to hand over their child while the rest of the Patrons and children can walk by and look in. Not even the dignity of a closed door for privacy during the worst day of their lives.

“I’m taking some paperwork to Gamiyan,” I say, regretting that I didn’t plan to drop it off early tomorrow morning while fewer people are awake.

“Fascinating,” Petia replies, with an insincere smile plastered on her face.

She knows I was the Silent Assassin, and I wish she was afraid of me instead of this confident hostility. Petia thinks of me as the little girl I was, smaller than my peers, and desperate to be loved. Oh, how I’ve changed—that little girl is now only desperate to be alone. Maybe I can leave her the parting gift of a few broken bones.

She and I, and two other Mievaborn women of a similar age were best friends when we were young. Too little to be bullies or know the way of the Divine world we live in. As the four of us got older, my differences became more apparent, and I drifted further and further from them. Their Gifts came in early, including Petia’s wet nursing, though she didn’t have to start feeding the new Patrons until she was much older.

And of course, my Gift never manifested. My Patron life file was updated to Null & Void the season I turned sixteen, officially branding me a Null. Though, I’d already been teased about it long before I even aged-up into secondary.

I’m snapped out of my memories by the sound of a soft mewling coming from the bundle in Petia’s arms.

“A new Patron of the Divine just arrived. Can you believe it? I haven’t seen a new Mutt in revolutions!” The slur shamelessly rolled off her tongue.

I shouldn’t be surprised by the way she speaks, it’s not like she’s alone in her views. The child looks about a moon old with a head of pale blonde hair like a Mievaborn, however, their little face is covered in Nemorisborn freckles.

I shudder to think of the life this child would have suffered through if they hadn’t become a Patron. Petia is right, I haven’t seen anyone risk bringing a child into this world with someone from a different country in a long time. Certainly, not many of them are in Osraed.

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