Page 42 of Protecting His Vampire Mate

Bryan watched me for a moment longer, something softening in his expression. I expected him to ask me about it, to pepper me with questions, or perhaps even for him to tell me how selfish it was not to be ridiculously grateful that the people closest to me were happy and loved. I was braced for any and all of it, my whole body going rigid with anxiety.

Instead, he said, “Thank you. If you want to talk about that more at some point, I’d listen.”

Wordlessly, I nodded, watching him.

And I suddenly did want to talk about it, more than I would have ever thought possible. But I pushed that notion away. I wasn’t here for me, after all. I was here for him. This whole encounter was only really happening because he was in danger. And once I had put a stop to it…

Well, what then?

It was better not to make this any messier and more confusing than it already was, right?

After a long moment, Bryan began dealing out the deck. “So, with this game, you’re going to want to focus on…”

And after that, Bryan began explaining the rules to me, breezing past the fact that my heart was basically leaking right out of my chest. And I knew it wasn’t because he wasn’t curious. He was holding space for me. Giving me permission to open up to him, on my own time.

Something relaxed deep inside me when I realized that he wasn’t going to force me to go further, even though a big part of me now wanted to. And I understood that he hadn’t shut the conversation down for him—I fully believed that if I wanted to talk to him, he’d listen.

Instead, he was just letting me be.

After a lifetime of being the golden boy for the coven, of feeling like I wasn’t worth all that much at all if I didn’t have all the answers for everyone around me, it was…

Well, it was a relief, is what it was.

I had seen Bryan coming years before we had ever met. I had known the face of the man I would fall in love with. But the spell I had cast—the Verum Amor—hadn’t been able to tell me why I might fall for him. I hadn’t even considered that part.

But another piece of the Bryan puzzle slotted into place, and it made me feel even more desperate to protect him. Perhaps because of his own pain, and perhaps simply because it was who he was, Bryan was a compassionate person. And when he looked at me, he didn’t see years of me trying to make myself useful so that I wouldn’t get left behind.

He just saw me, Tobias Hawthorne.

It was, I realized, the first time in a long time that anyone had.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN || BRYAN

Tobias had me feeling both confused and conflicted. I was equal parts ready to kiss him and thump him over the head for being so unkind to himself. Barring either of those things, it would probably be better for both of us if I ran for the hills.

But I couldn’t do that anymore, could I?

Because I understood him so much better now. It had all clicked into place for me, all at once. Tobias was used to being the one that everyone around him depended on. He was used to being the person everyone turned to. He was used to being needed.

Now, Ethan was married and off doing his own thing. His sister was off doing her own thing, too. And maybe the coven still needed him. Maybe. But given the fact that they hadn’t called him even once that I was aware of, maybe not.

And I…

Well, I was the worst offender, wasn’t I?

I had essentially recognized the mate bond between us and then noped the hell out of there. I had left him behind. And if I pulled the plug on this, I would be saying the same thing that everyone else around him seemed to be saying: that I didn’t need him.

It would hurt him all over again.

Tobias would be hurt, because of me. The thought turned my stomach.

So, grimly ignoring the uneasy feeling it evoked, I had agreed that we should interview the victim’s wife. We should at least move in the general direction of doing what we had set out to do, even if I wasn’t entirely sure that’s what I wanted anymore. Not when we were so clearly running straight into danger.

A little over an hour later, we pulled up to a small single-story house that had been painted sage green. The trim and front door were freshly painted bright white. There was a little, well-maintained garden out front.

“We don’t have to do this,” I said. “It’s been a million years since I’ve had a halfway decent bowl of ramen. We could—”

“No,” Tobias said firmly. He flashed me a tight, determined smile. “Look, I get it. The hunters spooked you. I promise that we’ll steer clear as much as possible. But we’re at least talking to Lisa.”

---