Page 128 of Barbi and the Villain

“But what if it could?”

My brows shoot up in question.

“What if being close to me did not hurt?”

“What are you trying to say?”

He takes a deep breath as he takes a seat on the ground next to me. He takes my hand into his much bigger one and squeezes it lightly.

“I was an asshole. But there is a reason for it, Barbs, despite the fact that it’s a very poor one.”

“Barbs?” I ask in amusement.

“You do not like it?” He blinks.

I shake my head, smiling.

“No one’s called me that before. I…like it,” I murmur shyly.

He smiles, nodding to himself.

“You were right. I am attracted to you. But the mere thought that I would find another female attractive scared me,” he admits.

“Why?”

“Because I vowed I would not.”

I remain silent as I look at his profile. The moonlight illuminates the high bridge of his nose, making him appear regal, unapproachable. But the mood surrounding us is completely opposite. For the first time, there is a vulnerability to him that calls to me.

And that scares me.

“I will respect your vow, Nykander. I will not attempt anything. Do not worry on my account. But we should continue at least on friendly terms. I forgive you for what you said, but that does not mean I will forget. Your words were cruel.”

Guilt pulls at his features.

“That is the issue, Barbs. I have already broken that vow and many others. I do not think this is just the mating bond. I am attracted to you, but more than anything… I want to spend time with you.”

“You do?” I ask, surprised.

“You’re funny and cute and so damn entertaining. I find myself laughing as I have not done in thousands of years. For the first time since Mo died, there is a lightness in my soul when I am in your presence.”

My heart pounds in my chest. But my mind refuses to believe his words. After all, I have been burned before.

“What are you trying to say?”

“I have been fighting my growing feelings for you since the moment we met. Before the mating bond. In the beginning, I thought you were entertaining because I had been locked up, alone, for so long. But that did not explain why I continued to yearn to be in your presence. After I left you in the woods, I considered walking away. I tried to walk away. But I could not. I told myself that I was looking out for you—but when have I looked out for anyone else? From the start, it was an anomaly that I sought to explain even when it was simply unexplainable.”

“Yet you pushed me away then too.”

“Because I was scared,” he admits, tilting his head to gaze at the stars. There is a trace of melancholy in his voice.

“You, scared?” I ask skeptically.

“Me, scared.” He chuckles. “Even to my own ears that sounds foreign.”

“Then why did you do it? Why were you so mean to me?”

“It was the only way to push you away. The more you smiled at me, the more you made me laugh, and it created a rift in my heart that I was unable to reconcile. One half wanted to continue as I have before: get the artifact, get back to Tartareia, and get my revenge. It seemed easy enough. But the other half wanted…more.”

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