Page 35 of Barbi and the Villain

I stretch, yawning as I slowly awaken. God, I had the most terrible dream. Not only was I trapped in a fictional world with no idea how to get back home, but all my role models turned out to be assholes. To top it off, I also annoyed some talking mummy who was just about to jump on me for stealing its finger.

Good thing this nice voice woke me up, or I would have experienced the wrath of the mummy in my dream. A shudder goes down my body. Why am I even dreaming about talking mummies? Do I have some unresolved trauma or something?

I smack my lips together, a little thirsty.

“Can I have a glass of water?”

Why am I so thirsty? I always hydrate well before bed, but now it’s like I haven’t had a sip of water in ages.

“Wake up, female!” the same voice commands.

My eyes flash open.

It’s dark. Too dark for this to be my room.

I’m also holding on to something.

I gulp down in apprehension.

The ridges of the ring are familiar. But there’s something else clinging to the ring. Something…

Oh. My. God.

Everything comes back to me, together with the realization that this is not a dream.

“Stay away from me!” I cry out, jumping up and scrambling as far away from the talking mummy. I hold the finger with the ring in front of me as some kind of crucifix, hoping it might save me from its wrath. After all, if it wants to hurt me, it might accidentally hurt its finger first. Awful logic, I know. But at this point, my brain is as mushy as the mummy’s insides.

“Cease your hysterics, female,” he decrees. But his imperial tone only makes my anxiety skyrocket.

“Don’t come closer. You’ll regret it,” I tell him, backing away until I hit the other wall of the cell. “I… I’m not someone you want to mess with,” I mumble, wildly looking around. It’s too dark to make sense of anything around me, and my heart is beating too loudly in my ears to be able to hear anything else.

Oh, God! I won’t even get to my execution because I will be killed by a mummy. Damn Ivan! He did this on purpose, that blasted man.

“Is that so?” he mocks me.

“Y-yes.” I raise my voice. “I…” Come on, Barbi, think of something. What could a mummy be afraid of? It’s already dead!

“You may not be aware, b-but I…” I swallow. “I was locked in here because the Dark One is my boyfriend.”

“Your boyfriend?” A low chuckle echoes in the cell.

“Y-yes. He is my boyfriend. He… He is very bad and dangerous and he can summon dark clouds and kill anyone with the snap of a finger,” I enumerate the things Jerry had told me about him. “He also loves me very much. I am the apple of his eye, his most beloved treasure, the beat of his heart—not that you would know since you’re a mummy and your heart is likely not beating—” I stammer as I try to think of more descriptors. “I’m the reason he wakes up in the morning, the light to his dark, dark soul—emphasis on dark,” I add, proud of my quick thinking.

“He would burn the world for me, you know, and you might be dead, but mummies can catch fire, too. In fact, you’ll probably be easier to incinerate than a non-mummified body, so you’ll die faster.” I clear my throat. “So you see, if you do anything to me, you’ll be the first one to pay the price.”

Silence greets me.

“Are you done?” he eventually asks in the same lazy voice.

“Uhm, no? He’s bad. Very, very bad.”

“So you have said,” he drawls.

I frown. I may not be able to see him, but I have the vague impression he’s laughing at me. And I can’t have that. He needs to understand I am off-limits.

“Well, he’s the worst villain Akkaya has ever seen. He’s so scary, people are afraid to even say his name because he might kill them.”

“You do not seem too afraid to say his name,” he notes drily.

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