Page 3 of The Bull's Head

“We’ll get through this, Teddy, I swear to you.”

“Alp? I’m sorry, you don’t need me to?—”

“We do,” Alp insisted. “Wald pack is a place to heal, to find yourself again. If you want it, this could be your home too. I know the Walker pack took you in and gave you back your life, but maybe here, with us, you can rediscover the joy in it.”

Joy? Teddy knew he didn’t deserve that. “Thank you, First mate.”

“Alp, you silly bear.” There was teasing, but Alp never stopped hugging Teddy, and for that, he was eternally grateful. When he looked up, he realized they were no longer in the media room, but had moved to a smaller, quieter room with a desk that had a computer atop it. He was grateful, because he didn’t want anyone else to see him break down.

At least not yet.

They stayed in the office for another thirty minutes, and wedged between Cece and Alp, Teddy finally was able to breathe again. His panic had been bad, but definitely not the worst ever. No, those attacks were reserved for his dreams, when Teddy was alone in his room, with nothing to keep the shadows of his failures from reaching out and pleading with him to save them.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come home?” Cece whispered in Teddy’s ear.

“Thank you, First mate, but…. I truly think this will be a place I can heal. I won’t be guarding anyone, so maybe I can slough off that role. Damon told Malachi that I would be good working in an office, sorting through Hyde’s papers, and making order out of the chaos that was caused when we… we….” He sighed. “When we killed these people.”

The rumble started out low, menacing, but grew until it needed voice. “No,” Cece barked gruffly. “These weren’t people. They called us monsters, but they killed innocent children, just like Hiram had. All of what happened here? It could have been avoided if the Council had looked into Hiram’s dealings. If Hiram hadn’t been so goddamned deranged. If….” She shuddered and shook her head. “No, sweetheart, these weren’t people. They lost the right to call themselves that with their first murder of a shifter.”

Teddy glanced down at where Alp’s arms still held him tight. He swallowed hard, looking at the place where Alp’s hand had been. The one Hyde and his people had cut off, trying to see if they could regrow lost limbs.

“No, they weren’t people at all,” he agreed. “If they wanted monsters, they only needed to look in the mirror.”

Cece snorted, then hugged Teddy again. “It’s going to be okay, Teddy. I swear it. And if you ever need me, you get on the phone, and I’ll be here as fast as I can. Damon, Wiley, and Micah will come too. We’re your family, and there’s no getting rid of us.”

The tension bled out of Teddy and he surrendered to the hug, reaching out and embracing Cece and Alp and squeezing them until Alp squeaked.

“I’m sorry, First… I mean, I’m sorry, Alp.”

The smile he got was blinding. “It’s fine,” he promised. “I give the kids a hug every night and kiss their foreheads, telling them this is their home and we love them. Maybe, one day, you could help me with that.”

The thought that a child might look at Teddy and not see the guilt in his expression?

“I think I would like that,” he replied.

“Great. Now, let’s see about getting you settled in.” He waved a hand at Teddy. “Since you’re so… big, we took one of the larger rooms and converted it. It’s pretty basic right now, but we can order you some things tomorrow. Or we could take a trip to the store in Swenson.”

“I’m sure it’s fine,” Teddy said. “I don’t need much.”

Cece snorted. “He’s been with us for years, and his room consists of a bed and a dresser. He takes Spartan to a whole new level.”

“I have simple needs,” Teddy told Alp. The truth was, he never became attached to anything anymore, because he never knew when it would be taken away from him.

“Well, the rooms lack color, so you’ll have to get something to make it lived in. Plus, there’s always the chance that one—or more—of the kids might ‘accidentally’ show up, and you don’t want them to worry you won’t stay. It’s up to you, of course. We just feel that we have to give the kids as much stability as possible, at least until we can show them no one here is going to disappear on them.”

“I understand” came the solemn reply. “Very well, we shall make it into a home so the children know I am a fixture and they can depend on me.”

Like Alana, Dmitri, and Casper had. Only this time, Teddy vowed he wouldn’t fail.

“Cece, wanna come with us? You can see the place before we hit the kitchen for popcorn.”

Cece’s shoulders slumped. “When I told you we were going to be best friends, I never thought you were this much a pain in the ass.”

Alp patted her on the shoulder. “Live and learn, baby,” he said, then cackled. “Guess Mom didn’t tell you everything, did she?”

This time Cece grinned. “I like a lot of butter on mine. And salt is non-negotiable.”

Alp grasped his chest, looking very offended. “Is there any other way?”

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