Page 70 of Love and Other Lost Things

Jane held out a palm. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

Ed bypassed her hand and reached out to give her a hug, his eyes sparkling with warmth. “Hannah has told me so many stories about you all as kids. I’m glad to finally meet you, Jane.”

Jane liked him immediately, and she felt her chest expand with hope that her friend had been lucky to meet a good man. He’d probably heard that Jane had run off without a word. Still, he welcomed her without hesitation.

“I heard you’re a police officer,” Jane said.

“I am, yeah. I knew your dad.” He avoided her gaze. “Sorry for your loss.” He cleared his throat like he’d had to force that last part out, and something about his tone gave Jane the feeling he was saying it more out of obligation than genuine feeling.

When Jane was growing up, all the officers on the police force seemed to be part of an old boys’ club, and Dad was their leader. He could do no wrong in their eyes. Jane remembered the officer who’d come when Mom had called 911. How he’d stood awkwardly in front of the house, backing away slowly while Mom cried. But Ed seemed uncomfortable with this conversation, almost like he hadn’t been a fan of Dad. Maybe in his later years, Dad’s cracks had started to show on the surface.

The front door swung open again, and this time it was Ali on the welcome mat, in a black dress under her elegant black coat. Next to her stood a tall, dark-haired woman in equally stylish attire. It was obvious they were a couple by the way the woman held on to Ali’s arm as she stepped into the house.

Jane felt a burst of happiness for her friend. Ali had come out to their group in high school, but she’d kept it a secret from her parents and everyone else. Linden Falls was a small town, and Ali had worried about people accepting her. But Ali was clearly out now, and Jane suspected that most people in town were just fine with it. She thought about Dad terrorizing Kait at the autobody shop, and then looked over to see Ed giving Ali and the other woman a warm greeting. Maybe this town really had changed.

In a bustle of hugs and casserole dishes being handed over, Jane somehow ended up standing across from Ali and her companion.

“Hi, Ali,” Jane said. “It’s good to see you again.”

“Jane. Hey.” Ali looked vaguely uncomfortable, but her eyes didn’t radiate the same anger from the other night. “This is my wife, Lexi.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” Lexi said, warmly.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you, too,” Jane said, her lips tugging as she remembered back to their dramatic teenage conversations when Ali used to lament that she’d be single forever because she was never going to meet a girl in this town. Jane’s eyes met Ali’s, who seemed to be holding back a hint of a smile, too. Maybe she was looking back on the same moments.

At that moment, Scarlett came running over. “Mommy, can I have the Legos we brought? Mrs. Andino said Amelia and I can go upstairs and play in the guest room.”

“Whoa, you have a kid?” Ali blurted out, her dark eyebrows raised.

Jane slid an arm around Scarlett’s shoulder. “This is my daughter, Scarlett.”

Scarlett peered up at Ali. “Your picture is hanging in my room at my grandma’s house. Were you my mom’s friend, like Hannah and Dr. Nik?”

“Yep, I sure was.” Ali’s dark eyes drifted over Scarlett. She blinked in surprise. “That’s a nice necklace you’re wearing.”

Scarlett beamed, reaching up to run her fingers over the twisted silver that Ali had shaped into musical notes over a decade ago. “It was my mom’s. She said it was her favorite.” Scarlett hadn’t taken the necklace off since Jane had given it to her the other day.

Ali’s face softened.

“I guess I should go get those Legos,” Jane said, swallowing down a lump in her throat.

“Sure,” Ali said. And then she added, “We’ll talk more later.”

Jane found her purse and fished out the bag of Legos, handing them to Scarlett. “Just clean up when you’re done, okay?” But Scarlett was already running off to find her new friend.

Jane headed into the kitchen, where she found Mom and Mrs. Andino putting the finishing touches on dinner, laughing over glasses of wine. Mom’s eyes were bright, happy. Jane had so few memories of seeing her this light and carefree. The crease of anxiety was gone from her forehead, and her eyes didn’t dart to the door, worried that Dad might walk in. She was finally free of the dark cloud that had hung over her for the past three decades.

That’s what I want, too.

The freedom from fear, from looking over her shoulder.

The thought stayed with Jane throughout the holiday meal as the laughter and warmth of her old friends surrounded her. She didn’t have to hold her breath, or censor herself, or worry that something might set someone off. When Scarlett reached across the table and knocked over her glass of grape juice, nobody even blinked. Nik simply got up and grabbed a towel, tossing it on the stain and remarking that he’d always thought the tablecloth would look better tie-dyed anyway. Scarlett’s shoulders had immediately relaxed.

This could be our future.

At home, Jane’s spine would have stiffened, automatically, out of habit. Her nervous gaze would have flown to Matteo’s face turning white, jaw twitching. Later, he would have made sure she knew he blamed her for Scarlett’s carelessness. But the worst part would have been watching Scarlett react. Her posture tense, her eyes clouding with fear.

We don’t have to live like that anymore.

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