Page 62 of Love and Other Lost Things

The silence stretched, and she knew he was waiting for more of an explanation. But how could she sum up the last ten years? She couldn’t, so instead, she stabbed her fork into the pad thai. “You were lovely with Scarlett today. I really appreciate it.”

“She’s a great kid.” Nik smiled. “And just as competitive as her mom, I noticed.”

Jane laughed, grateful to lighten the mood. “Yes, I’ve created a monster who can now destroy me.” Jane had lost badly to both Nik and Scarlett at Uno. In the end, Nik had come out the champion, but Scarlett had put up a good fight.

“Does she take after you in other ways? Does she play music? I remember around that age you were constantly singing show tunes.”

Jane shook her head. “I must have been so obnoxious.”

“I always loved your voice.” He gave her a crooked grin. “And thanks to you, I still belt out ‘Defying Gravity’ in the shower. Don’t tell anyone.”

“I would never.” Jane handed him the carton of pad thai. “No, Scarlett doesn’t really sing. She’s more of a reader. And she likes to draw.” Jane had encouraged quiet activities. She couldn’t imagine Scarlett belting out “Defying Gravity” when Matteo was around.

“Since Scarlett will need to take it easy for a few days, I’ll see what books my mom has lying around in my old bedroom.”

He just kept taking care of them, and she didn’t feel like she deserved it. Especially since she’d kept Scarlett a secret from him. “Nik, I’m sorry you had to find out about her like this.”

Nik regarded her across the narrow space. “I wish you’d told me last night. But…”

“But what?”

He sighed. “I don’t know. Now that I’ve met her, I get it. A decade has gone by. You have this whole other life, and you and I are basically strangers.”

That was the thing. It didn’t feel like a decade had gone by. And Nik didn’t feel like a stranger. He felt safe. Familiar. Her feelings for Nik had grown slowly over time from best friends to something that could have been so much more. At eighteen, she’d loved him madly, desperately. Looking back on her life in Los Angeles, she’d managed to convince herself that she’d moved on. But now she could see it all so much more clearly. Her best friend had been the love of her life. She’d lost so much when she’d walked away.

“Is Scarlett’s dad…” Nik waved a hand absently. “… in the picture? Does he know about Scarlett’s accident?”

Jane bit her lip. “No. I didn’t tell him.”

“Can I ask why?”

Jane hadn’t planned to say anything. But the exhaustion of the past week—the past decade—washed over her. And being around Nik made her feel safer, and more cared for, than she had in years. “I left him. We’re not together anymore. Matteo isn’t very interested in being a part of our lives.” Every word was the truth. Matteo might have had a strong desire to control their lives, but very little actual interest in her or Scarlett.

Nik leaned forward and set the food container on the table in front of him. “I’m sorry.” He shifted to face her. “Not that you left him. I’m sorry that you had to go through all that.”

Jane stared down at her hands. “It’s for the best.”

Nik slid closer. “Is it?” He reached up and put a gentle hand on her cheek, rubbing his thumb on the spot where she knew her bruise was fading, but not quite gone.

He knows Matteo put that mark there. Nik had always been observant, especially when it came to her.

“It shows a lot of strength to decide you deserve better,” he said.

Jane didn’t feel strong. She felt terrified. But for the first time in a long time, maybe she didn’t feel completely alone. Mom was waiting at home, and she’d texted twice to check in. Jane’s gaze drifted to Nik. His shift had ended hours ago. He didn’t need to be here. But he was. Bringing her food, checking in on her daughter, and making her long for all sorts of things that she never thought she’d ever have.

Their eyes met. If she leaned in a couple of inches, she could press her mouth to his. It was so tempting. To fall into him, to be encircled by the safety of his arms.

But Jane slid back in her seat, away from him, her face flushing. “I’m sorry. This isn’t a good idea…”

Nik shook his head. “No, I’m sorry. You have an injured kid across the hall. I don’t want to put this pressure on you.”

“Nik…” Jane reached out a hand to touch his arm, but then she let it drop in her lap at the last second. “It’s not that I don’t feel this. But…” She bit her lip. “I’m leaving.” In less than a week, she would disappear from his life. How could she get involved and then put him through that again? How could she put herself through it again?

“Don’t say anything now.” He slid the carton of food into her hand. “You need to eat.”

While they finished the pad thai, Nik filled Jane in on the Linden Falls gossip. He told her about the town council painting the water tower coral and accidentally turning it into a giant penis, and then about the senior prank where the football team hired a crane to move the principal’s car to the roof of the high school. Lighthearted stories that made her laugh and distracted her from everything swirling around in her head. As she cleaned up after they’d eaten, and threw away the trash, she realized he’d known exactly what she needed in that moment.

They headed back across the hall to check on Scarlett. Nik bustled around the room, scrolling through a file on the computer to check the nurse’s notes, glancing at the monitors on the wall. Jane stood back and watched as he rounded the hospital bed to grab an extra blanket from the cabinet. The dim light shone across his face as he leaned in to spread it across Scarlett and tuck it under the corners of the bed.

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