Page 152 of The Last Good Man

I shift my gaze to her.

She looks at me as if this is the first time she realizes how serious this thing is.

“I think I am. If nothing works out, I’ll probably consider it.It’s too early to think about it, but the reality is,time is not on my side. I want to do this sooner than later.”

“Can’t you just find someone to, um… you know, sleep with instead of using donor sperm?”

“Isn’t it the same thing but with so many legal and emotional complications? I don’t want to deal with that.”

“What about the baby?”

I think about it for a moment.

“It’s too early to go so deep into this topic. Donor sperm is obviously not my first choice, but it will be my last for sure. And if I need to, I’ll do it. I want kids but don’t care for a bad marriage and a messy divorce or to look for someone in perpetuity.”

She stares at me, stunned, before taking a long breath and slowly exhaling.

“How long have you been dating?”

“I wouldn’t call it dating, but let’s say it was dating for the sake of the argument. On and off for a few years, not considering the relationships.”

She tips her head to the side in disagreement, and I continue.

“Seriously applying myself? It’s probably been six months now? More or less.”

“It took me a year,” she says.

“You were lucky.”

“Maybe. The point is youneed to be patient.”

I look at her, chewing on my lip, a bit emotional after what happened last night.

“I think I’m done,” I say.

What hurts the most is that I like that man.

Jax London.

He would be perfect if I were twenty-one. Perhaps a college student. We would have so much fun, spending the nights talking and fucking like we did in Connecticut…Almost fucking.

Traveling the world, perhaps.

By the time we were twenty-five, twenty-six, or even thirty, we’d be ready to settle down.

We might not last that long, but we’d have our story.

With how things are, though… We won’t have a chance.

And it’s not only one thing.

We’d be good in bed. Yes, we would. And we’d have fun. And maybe, despite the differences,he’dbecome my best friend, but other than that?

He is a wild, volcanic man.

He is young. No matter what he says, he hasn’t reviewed all his options.

He can’t say I’m his woman. No one could in his place.

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