Page 107 of Serpentine

MILES

“Tell me again…” My mind can’t wrap around what’s right before me. Usually, I’m not so obtuse.

Aella stops before me, where I’m sitting on the edge of my bed. Brax is seated in the chair in front of my desk, swiveling the chair back and forth. He releases an exasperated breath. I can’t fucking blame him.

Aella crouches in front of me. “I think she’s alive.”

The entire sentence makes me feel like my world has just imploded, and the bits are raining down on me like acid rain. The pain is unexplainable.

“But…” I trail off, swallowing past the lump in my throat.

“Yeah,” Brax pipes up, “she left us.”

Aella turns on him, likely pinning him with a glare that tells him to shut his mouth because I’m in a state.

I usually pick up the bits and pieces of mess and glue them back together as best I can. I’m the fixer who steps in when anyone needs me, even strangers.

“Look at me,” Aella says, and it feels like the world around me is still spinning, but my vision tunnels enough so I can lock in on her. “Take a breath.”

I listen to her as her hands wrap around both of my wrists.

The day I saw Mom last plays through my mind like a sick fucking joke. It’s the entire foundation of why we’ve done all we have. Getting her back is our core fucking mission.

“She can’t be alive.” It’s all I can get out. My voice is unrecognizable as my own.

“Why?”

I try to break free of her hold enough to force her to back up and give me space. She stays firm, gripping me tightly, as if she knows better than I do what I need.

“Let me go,” I grumble.

Brax stands, coming to her rescue. As if I’d ever fucking hurt her.

“No,” she says. “Talk it through with me. Tell me what you’re feeling.”

I laugh because I can’t do anything but laugh. So that I don’t break. So I don’t cry. “This is too much.” My voice cracks.

“Hey, you’re not alone. I’m here. Brax is here. We’re right here. Tell me.”

“We dedicated our entire lives to finding her. It feels like… Aella…” A sob breaks from my throat without my permission, and I hang my head to control my emotions.

“Why?” she whispers.

“Because, Aella!” I stand, breaking away from her. The papers fly around the room as I huff and throw the file on the wall. “She fucking left us! We spent our lives looking for her. Working towards burying her, and the entire time, she was alive! Living her best fucking life, collecting her paychecks?! Like, what the actual fuck?! Who am I without…” I trail off, punching my hand through the door.

The sound of wood splintering around my fist is the only sound before stillness permeates the space.

Neither Brax nor Aella say a word.

Suddenly, I feel her arms wrap around me from behind, her head following as she rests it on my back. This is a similar hold to the one I’ve had to give Braxton over the years. She’s trying to hold me to the world as she’s done for him. As I have. As Mom has.

Something about it breaks my fucking heart. That my world has gotten to this point.

“She left us, Aella,” I tell her. Strangled sobs pull Braxton to my side. Even if he doesn’t touch me, his presence is enough.

He’s taking this better than I am. But he needs time to process anything that happens. Later, we’ll deal with the aftermath once he finally lets himself feel it all. Once it all hits a fucking head.

"We don't know that, Miles," Aella whispers, her gentle touch sending shivers down my spine.

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