Page 88 of Can We Just Be Happy Now?

“No,” I cry, wiping the backs of my hands across my eyes in an attempt to clear them, but all it does is make room for new tears as I wonder if getting back to what we had is even possible.

“Things are never going to be how they were between us,” he says as if he’s read my mind. “So stop trying.”

“You came when I called, though . . .” I say under my breath.

“Don’t take advantage of that.” He stares straight ahead, waiting for me to get out of the car.

“Cooper. Come on. I miss you.” I take a deep breath. “What if . . .” I hesitate, not knowing the effect my next words will have. I need him to snap, to remember how good it feels when we are more. “I miss the way you touch me, Coop. He doesn’t touch me like you do. Or love me like you do. No one does.” Cooper has never actually told me that he loves me, but I know he does. He has to.

He stares, the anger in his voice replaced by something else entirely. “What in the actual fuck is wrong with you?”

My eyes widen at his harsh words. That wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for. I stay silent.

“I don’t know where my Sophie is, but you’re not her. Or maybe this is who you are now, and I need to accept it and move on.” His fingers dig into his eyes like the motion will erase me.

“No,” I whisper, more to myself than him.

The heat from the vents is the only thing breaking up the loaded air between us. Unable to handle us fighting for another second, I get out of his car, slamming the door behind me.

Chapter fifty-three

COOPER

NOW

Sophie storms toward her front door, but right before she reaches it, she turns on her heel and crosses half the distance back to my car.

“You know what?” she screams through the darkness.

Yanking my key from the ignition, I slam my car door, my Nikes audibly hitting the pavement as I approach her before I can stop myself. “Tell me, Sophie. What?” As if on cue, a crack of thunder booms behind the stormy, gray clouds I didn’t notice in the midst of our bullshit. Of fucking course. We simultaneously tilt our heads. Water sprinkles through the air, misting my face and distracting me. As if that was enough warning, the sky opens up and rain pours from the sky. Water spots in Sophie’s hair grow until she’s sopping wet in front of me, frozen in place. She wipes her hands across her face, new tears mixed with the rain, but doesn’t make a move.

I run my hand through my hair, water flinging off the ends. “What do you want?”

“I won’t leave us like this, Cooper.” I can barely hear her over the rain.

Laughing, I close some of the distance between us. “Since when do you care about how you leave me?”

“I do care!” she screams angrily like I’ve accused her of something terrible.

“That doesn’t exactly track.” I laugh humorlessly, with no idea why I’m still entertaining her, considering once again she’s done exactly the thing that pisses me off the most. I have no clue why we are standing in the pouring rain. It’s dramatic. Like everything else is between us.

Sandals slick against the concrete, she takes two careful steps closer, leaving only a small gap between us. Her wet dress clings to every curve. Fuck. Every time I see her she seems so much more grown-up than the last time. The outline of her lace thong is clear through the fabric. I stare a beat too long and she catches me, taking another step until she’s close enough I could reach out and touch her. “Admit that you want me.” She must have siphoned her declaration from the way I’m looking at her–a look that surely says all I can think about is ripping that dress off her wet skin and throwing her onto her bed.

There’s no use in lying when she knows me as well as she does. “You were just with someone else. I’m not doing that shit again.”

“No, I wasn’t. I didn’t touch him,” she says at normal volume, but she’s close enough I can hear her.

I search her eyes for truth, and can’t tell if I find it, or if my need for her is deceiving me. “What do you want from me, Sophie?” The volume has left my voice, but the anger is still there.

She looks at her fingers where they are toying with the fabric of her dress suctioned to her waist. “You,” she whispers, then jerks her gaze to me. “YOU,” she says more definitively, like it’s obvious, and I should know her better.

“Don’t do this,” I growl, my hands fighting their pull to her. I harness the same rage the rain has as it smacks against the cement. Maybe she didn’t sleep with JT, but she was still with another guy. Again. Not to mention before that she was posting pics on her birthday with who the hell knows who.

“I can’t help it.” She presses her hands against my T-shirt covered chest, the contact feeling like the lightning that has yet to strike around us. Her touch, her words, they used to be the only thing that cooled me off. They don’t have the same effect on fires started by her–at least not right now.

My fists clench at my sides. Do not fucking touch her, Cooper. She hasn’t proven she can stay. She hasn’t proven she’s only yours. I take a small step back and her fingertips drag down my stomach. They catch on the edge of my shorts, heavy from how wet they are. I can’t handle being here. I’m not capable of pushing her away much longer even though that’s what I need to do.

My hands clamp down on her wrists, pulling them away from my skin. She doesn’t flinch at how tight my hold is on her–she just keeps her eyes locked on mine. “I’m leaving,” I say, but my body doesn’t listen. Tell me not to go. I’m so mad, but her closeness is the only thing that always brings me back down.

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