Page 22 of Can We Just Be Happy Now?

A small panic rushes through me. Whether it’s for me or her, I’m not sure. I lean in close enough to feel her warm breath on my lips. Before I can capture it with a kiss, she pulls away, sliding out of my grasp.

There’s hardly enough time for me to process before she has her knees pulled tightly to her chest, her eyes trained on the fabric of her dress.

“Soph?”

Silence.

Hooking my finger under her chin, I raise her gaze to meet mine. The tip causes one of the tears floating in her eyes to fall. “Hey,” I say softly, pulling her to me. She resists, then concedes, twisting how she sits and letting me hold her. “What’s wrong?”

In her silence, my eyes flicker to the movement on the drive-in screen but quickly settle back on my view of her cuddled into my chest. I smooth my hand over her hair, slowly and consistently until the slight shake of her body stops.

“I’m scared,” she whispers.

“Of what?”

Silence again.

Pressing her away from me, I encourage her to look at me again with my hand locked on her neck. “To kiss me?”

She nods. “What if . . .”

I give her space to continue.

“What if I mess it up? What if I suck? What if you don’t like me anymore?”

Taking a deep breath, I stroke my thumb across her cheek, and I don’t miss the way she leans into my touch. I’m nervous too, but I know I’m the one who needs to reassure her. “You’re not going to suck. It’s mostly natural instinct. You’ll know what to do without even thinking about it.”

Her eyes search mine for sincerity. “I heard you and Troy talking once. About this girl you kissed. You said it sucked. And you’ve kissed a lot of girls.”

She’s not wrong. I could probably count if I thought hard about it, but I don’t even have a guess off the top of my head. “Soph,” I hold back a chuckle, “It sucked because I wasn’t into her. And it doesn’t matter how many girls I’ve kissed. None of them are you.”

“How can you say that when you don’t know if I’m any good?” Her voice is still weak.

As worried as she is, I’m not concerned in the least. “I have enough confidence for both of us, but let’s wait until you feel it too. It’s okay,” I reassure her. I’ve waited this long. I can wait longer.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, another tear slipping down her pretty face. I brush it away, the wetness rolling down my thumb.

“No reason to be. Come here.” I lay back, tugging her with me until we are on our sides, facing each other.

I tuck a stray curl behind her ear, leaving my hand to rest on her neck. Her hand lands softly on my hip, and she twists the fabric of my shirt between her fingers. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me. You should never do anything you’re uncomfortable with. I just want you to feel the confidence I think you’re worthy of.” She nods, a little more accepting of the situation. I kiss her forehead and relax into my previous position, fingers woven into her hair, eyes locked on her. “I’m happy we’re here, together, regardless of what we do or don't do.”

My shirt stops twisting against my skin, and her hand flattens against my side. Then, she presses her lips against mine.

Her lips are soft, and the smell of her flowery body spray invades the space around us. It’s perfect. A little surprised, I pull back slightly to gauge her reaction but don’t loosen my hold on her. Her brown eyes reflect the movie I forgot was playing, and before I have a chance to check in, her fingers gravitate to the strings of my hoodie, pulling me back to her by the tug on my neck. She kisses me again once, softly. Then, as if she’s done this a hundred times before, she presses against my mouth, her lips parting just enough to give me better access to her. Our tongues tangle, and it’s sweet. In how she tastes. In how she moves in sync with me. It’s like everything around us fades away, and it's just me and her, like this is how it’s supposed to be.

We keep kissing, for who knows how long–neither one of us wanting to break the kiss. We only get the first one once, and I don’t want it to end. I’m so damn hooked on this girl already. Maybe I always have been.

She pulls back first, but only enough that our lips could still brush if I leaned in at all. It’s so dark I can hardly see her, but I feel her smile before she speaks. “That was easier than I thought it would be.”

I chuckle, brushing my thumb across her cheek. “Everything is easy with you.”

“So, it wasn’t bad for you? Remember, you promised to give me a second chance if it was.” She’s dead serious as if she doesn’t know she just ruined me for any other girl with that one kiss.

“Sophie, I’m going to kiss you, a lot more than one more time, but it’s not because you need another chance. You’re perfect.” I whisper the last words against her lips before I kiss her again, just once.

When I pull back, she looks so relaxed, happy and comfortable being here with me. I wish I could bottle up the way I’m making her feel at this moment so she could always feel that way.

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