Page 50 of Of Glass and of Gold

“Report said he left his shift like normal, but his parents claimed he never made it home. The boy is only sixteen.”

If I hadn’t heard it in his voice, I would have felt the anger coming off him in waves.

“Did you speak to his parents?” I asked.

“No, I was…busy. Couldn’t manage to get away until now.”

Busy. Get away. The words were reminders that I didn’t know the man beside me. He lived a regular life outside of night stalking, just as I did. What were the kind of things he did with his time? Who was he beyond the mask and mission for avenging? Beyond his willingness to rush to my side. Did he work a normal job? Was he someone I’d interacted with before? My stomach tightened with curiosity, and I tried stomping out my interest. That wasn’t important right now.

“Where did you hear this from?” Odion had today off, which explained why he wouldn’t have heard the gossip yet. But who were Chol’s sources?

“I have connections to the castle guards,” he said.

My stomach dropped. “What’s your connection? Was it obvious you were digging for information when you asked?” Worry bubbled up with my question.

“I—” he paused, taking a moment to choose his words carefully, which only made me more uneasy. The secrecy annoyed me. It would be so much easier to have all the information so I could accurately assess the situation. Hypocritical of me, seeing as I wouldn’t dare give him that same info.

“You don’t need to worry about that.” He sounded so confident, but inappropriately placed confidence could screw everything up.

I wrestled with concern, debating whether I should reveal what I’d learned from Odion, and my personal theory that the guards were intentionally not getting involved, or at least, making it appear that way. Who better to get away with crimes than those in charge of investigating them?

But Chol certainly didn’t reveal all his cards to me, and withholding intel would be a smart choice, considering I didn’t truly know the man wedged beside me. Where his loyalties lied at the end of the day.

But my thoughts circled back. He walked around, unmasked during the day, living his life as exposed as I did. If I kept my mouth shut, and he didn’t know to be careful with his sources, it could put him in danger. I may not know him well, but I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if he got into trouble. After all, he was the only other soul I’d met who seemed to give a damn enough about South Harbor’s people to actually do something about it.

“I’ve learned something, too. These shops have been commanded by the royal guard to close early. Now, I don’t know about you, but that would be a pretty perfect operation if this was all orchestrated by the castle. It would explain why that son of a bitch prince has stayed his hand time and time again when we’ve begged for help. Why the strip isn’t currently sealed off for investigation regarding four burned bodies.

“And if that’s the case, you better be damn careful when probing your sources for information. I don’t know who you are in the day, what roles you’ve taken, but if you’re not careful, it could be you next among the missing if you sniff around and ask the wrong people the right questions.”

He stilled. I couldn’t even feel the sway of his breathing anymore. The silence swallowed us as wholly as the shadows. He probably realized, just as I had, that if the castle was involved and responsible for the kidnappings, that he and I were severely outmatched.

“How do you know the shops are closing early?” he finally asked.

“I have sources, too.”

We communicated in a language of words that said very little. Necessary for survival in circumstances like this, to keep ourselves safe, protected.

“I think you’re the only one I can trust, Ella.” A sadness carried his quiet words, then he laughed a laugh that held no warmth or real amusement. “And that’s pretty pathetic, considering.”

Trust. I didn’t even know how to hold that word anymore. It’d become such a foreign, slippery thing. After losing my father, even trust became too expensive a currency. I couldn’t trust Eucinda to love and care for me, couldn’t trust being shown kindness from those we knew in the midst of poverty. Couldn’t trust that I’d have a full belly despite back-breaking shifts at the tavern. Couldn’t trust the Crown to aid its people when it was their only lifeline.

Chol was a fool for such a notion, given that he knew nothing about me. But from the way he expressed it, I could hear the defeat that plagued his soul.

I knew he held burdens. I could tell because I did, too. But to have someone think that highly of me in such a precarious circumstance warmed me in a way I didn’t expect. Chol saw a side of me that no one else did. One that was willing to take action against circumstances that continually beat me down. One that added a splash of color on the otherwise bleak canvas that was my life. One I couldn’t share with those closest to me.

Maybe he saw the truest version of myself, out here, actually trying to make a difference without the restraints of the world bounding me in chains. I didn’t have to cower, to be submissive, to let others control me. Yet, technically, he was the one I hid the most from.

Even the use of ‘Ella’ made the knife of guilt twist a little in my gut. How could he trust someone he didn’t even know? He had no idea who I was, what my life was like, what I’d been through. And yet, coming together in this common goal mattered more about who I was than any of those other things.

The parts of me he saw were the purest, and his acceptance of it resounded with the chorus of a tune I’d long forgotten. Perhaps no one could ever know all of me, and I’d forever remain only a fraction of myself to those I held dear. But if even one person knew me at my core, it acted as a healing balm to my cracked, battered heart.

“You are pretty lucky to have me,” I said, fixing a mask of casual indifference to hide the fever of emotions his simple comment brought about. “And you finally admitted that I’m a lady.”

“When?”

“Last night, when you so bravely stood up for this fair maiden.” I couldn’t help but tease.

He nudged me with his elbow and released a breathy laugh. Cinders in my soul sparked to life, and despite my best efforts, the joy spread across my face. Because of the mask, I didn’t have to hide it. Indulging in that sliver of happiness loosened something bound tight within.

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