Page 49 of Blaze of Our Lives

“MOVE YOUR ASS,” Pandora shouted. “Since they’re cheating, we’ll out-cheat them. Trust me on this. I’m a fabulous cheater. Lots of practice!”

I went for it. “We’re at the mud box,” I told her. As before, the landmines weren’t so hidden, and I was able to avoid them. Going on all fours instead of on my stomach was the best move ever. The net over me made it still made it slow going. The mud was the same—tarry black, warm and gooey. It still smelled like the culinary disaster that Tim had prepared for lunch. However, this time, none of it was a surprise.

“Son of a bitch,” I choked out as I got some of the rank sludge in my mouth. I stupidly tried to wipe it away with mud-covered hands. Piss-poor move. My face was now covered in the nasty shit. Again. “Sorry.”

“For the love of everything disgusting,” Pandora griped. “One thing. I only asked for one thing, and you just had to eat another mud pie.”

“Dude,” I snapped, trying to spit the dreck out. “If you keep bitching, I’m going to eat some on purpose.”

“You wouldn’t,” she gasped out.

“Try me.”

The suction noise was still repulsive, but the panic and fear I’d felt on the practice run were gone. I knew I could get through it. Being on all fours made it feel like nothing compared to earlier. Although the mud was yet again getting thicker and more cement-like with every inch forward I moved.

“Done,” I ground out. I got myself out of the box at much greater speed this time. I was the badass. Now, I just needed to keep being the badass.

“Keep going,” Pandora urged. “Stay alert.”

“Hot rocks. About ten feet ahead,” I narrated. “Ground definitely full of landmines. I’m going to take a different path than before.”

“Slowly,” Pandora commanded. “We bought time in the mud box. We have my appendages on standby.”

“Should I fly over the mines?”

She paused only a second. “No. Keep that for the bridge. If they know what we can do, they’ll try to thwart us.”

“Good thinking.” Slowly and with the same painstaking attention to the ground ahead as before, I made my way.

It wasn’t a surprise when Heff got back in on the action. The game seemed to be on a loop. His line was expected.

“Hey, Butch Goddess Messily,” Heff yelled from his comfortable and landmine-free seat in the bleachers. “Remember, there’s a time limit on getting through the obstacle course. Fifteen minutes.”

“Hard to forget, Fuckface McShitty-Dancer,” I retorted.

I gifted myself with a quick glance at him. His expression was horrified.

“I’m a great dancer,” he shrieked through the bullhorn.

“Nope. Your dancing is so bad, you broke the stairway to heaven.”

“Your balls just got bigger!” Pandora squealed with joy. “That was a slick burn.”

I turned my attention back to the game. As much as I’d like to continue ripping Heff a new butthole, it wasn’t worth it. Pandora’s life and mine were worth far more than winning a game of words with an asshole.

“I don’t see any mines,” I shared with my teammate.

“Doesn’t mean they’re not there. What the eye misses is a lot.”

Unfortunately, her words were prophetic.

The sound of the explosion sucked. The shock and the pain as I stepped on the mine this time were worse than before.

As my body went flying toward the rocks, I felt my leg being ripped from my body. It seemed no matter which path I took the results would be the same as the first run. Not. A. Problem. I had an ace—or rather an extra leg—in the hole. The grenade, as before, had no mind, no pity and zero care that it had just torn part of me away. My scream of agony was loud, but there was a smile on my lips. Landing with a loud thump on the ground in front of the hot rocks, I gulped in oxygen and tried to stay calm.

“Leg’s gone,” I reported.

“Still alive?” Pandora asked.

---