Page 83 of Bad Professor

For the final class, Dexter seems sad as he wishes us well, and promises to get our papers back to us as soon as he can. I ended the course with an A and I think my final paper will only help my grade.

I take my time, waiting for the rest of the students to say goodbye to Dexter. He finally sees me waiting and the expression on his face cracks my heart a little.

“Tilly.” Even the smile looks hopeful.

“I enjoyed the class, Professor.”

Dexter’s face falls. His shoulders slump. Everything about his body language tells me he’s disappointed by my comment. Or lack of comment.

“Thank you,” I add, then straighten my shoulders and walk past him.

I feel like crying.

“Tilly,” Dexter calls after me.

When I turn, it looks like Dexter is close to tears as well. But I don’t let anything show. I have perfected the blank expression.

“Have a nice summer,” he says miserably.

“You, too.” Then I walk away,

That night, I head to Ye Olde Sports Bar.

I’ve thought long and hard about this, whether I want to allow Dexter back into my life. What happens if I want to, and he’s moved on?

Because I’ve tried to move on, and it didn’t do any good.

I thought the girls had forgotten about Dexter, but only last week Jordan asked about him.

That helped me make up my mind.

I walked into the bar, wearing my best jeans, a black silky shirt, and a brand new bra and underwear set.

It’s green, which I happen to know is Dexter’s favourite colour.

As I take a seat at a table, I see him sitting at the bar with Max and Nick. Nerves and excitement bubble inside me, and I wonder how long I should wait.

I don’t wait long at all. Impatiently, I pull out my phone.

Me: You look bored

When Dexter jumps off the stool, whipping his head around trying to find me, I think it might be the best thing I’ve ever seen.

“Dex?” I hear Max say.

And then he sees me and I don’t hear anything else but the thundering of my heart as he stumbles across the crowded bar.

“Tilly.” Dexter’s dark eyes are wide and incredulous. There’s hope on his face, the same hope I wiped off in class today. I had to do that, to know if there was still a chance. Because Dexter wouldn’t have looked that miserable if he had moved on.

And if he hadn’t moved on, if he hadn’t forgotten, then I might have a chance to explain. How I only kept my distance to protect him? How I needed the time to find myself, to truly become the woman he helped me create.

I needed time to sort out my life, to free myself from the bonds Carlos still kept me in. A new job, a new apartment. I decided not to finish my English degree and go back to work full-time.

Soon, the only hold Carlos will have on me is through our children, and I can live with that. There will be no more walking into my apartment, no more dictating who I can and can not be with.

For the first time, I feel free to go after what I want.

And I want Dexter. I just hope he still feels the same way.

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