Page 42 of Lost in You

Her cheeks flush. “No, I’m too self-conscious for that.”

She wouldn’t be with me. I’d take as much time as I needed so she was comfortable and into it. But since I’m actively trying not to end up in bed with her, I force myself to move on.

I lose the next game of Boggle, the whiskey going down smoothly. Pretty sure reimbursing the cabin owner for that bottle is going to cost me a pretty penny, but I don’t give a fuck. Trinity and I both need to unwind and have some fun.

“Truth,” I proclaim, plunking the shot glass onto the table.

She’s ready. Her lips curve into a sexy smile as she asks, “How many times have you masturbated since we’ve been here?”

“Uh...” I grin at her and clear my throat. “Three times.”

Her eyes widen in surprise. “Three? That’s it?”

I laugh. “What, are you flicking the bean every day in the outhouse or something?”

Her eyes dance playfully. “You have to win a game if you want me to answer that.”

She shakes up the letters in the Boggle cube to start the next game. Both of us spend the first minute furiously writing down words, but after that, I can only concentrate on thoughts of Trinity never being fucked to orgasm by a man. She might as well just use a vibe if she has to be on top every time to get off.

By the end of the three minutes, her list is so much longer that I just shake my head.

“You whipped my ass,” I mutter.

She pours a shot and passes me the glass. “Bottoms up, captain.”

Bottoms up. Fuck. Now I’m imagining her round, gorgeous ass in the air. This is heaven and hell, the lines so blurred I can’t remember a single reason why I shouldn’t pick her up and carry her over to the bed right now.

I tip back the shot, a comfortable buzz making me relaxed. Trinity looks at me intently from the other side of the table.

“When you said you don’t even have casual sex, what did you mean?”

I freeze. Why did I tell her that? Her eyes stay locked onto me as I rub a hand over my short beard, considering what to say.

“All the things you could dare me to do and you’d rather ask me that?”

She nods.

I exhale heavily. That’s something I never talk about, to anyone. But the whiskey and this cabin that feels like it’s on the edge of the world make me care less. She bared her soul to me about her anxiety—I might as well be honest with her, too.

“I haven’t had intercourse with a woman in—” I stop to do the math. “I’m thirty-four now, so I guess it’s been nine years.”

Her jaw drops with surprise. “Why?”

“I’m...too worried I’ll get a woman pregnant. I usually couldn’t even come from sex because I was so worried about it.” A few seconds of silence pass before I continue. “Oral and anal can be just as good, you know.”

Saying it makes me feel exposed. It’s so much more comfortable for everyone to think I’m a red-blooded man who fucks every willing single woman I encounter.

Trinity clears her throat. “Are you just saying that to make me feel better about you not wanting to fuck me?”

I laugh a single note. “Uh, no. It’s the truth.”

“And women are okay with it?”

“You’d be surprised how much women enjoy having their pussies eaten and being finger fucked until they’re squirting all over the bed.”

Her cheeks turn pink and I can actually see the bob in her throat when she swallows. I can already see us both ending up on the floor from this variation of the game of Boggle.

The hangover tomorrow will be so fucking worth it.

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