Page 69 of Wish You Would

I nodded. It was true, and she wasn’t the first person to say it. I’d had a million conversations with my brother since coming home, and he echoed this exact sentiment. He was truly too good for this world. I didn’t deserve him—not his love or his forgiveness.

But he gave it anyway.

Which was why…

“I can’t join the band because of Vaughn.”

Parker frowned. “What do you mean? I’m sure he’d—”

“I left him alone. For years, he was alone. He took care of Dad when he was sick, he planned the funeral, he kept Heathcliff’s afloat. Alone. Because I was too ashamed, too selfish to come home. To face him, and this place. To admit how badly I’d fucked up.” I shook my head, resolute in at least this. “He deserves to live for himself now. He deserves to be happy.”

“Gigi—”

“Joining the band would mean I couldn’t be there, at the bar, to run it. To keep it alive while he does what makes him happy. He’s always wanted to teach, you know. He’s such a nerd.” I smiled, despite myself. “I want that for him. I want him to get his degree and find a job that isn’t slinging beers. I want him to have the freedom to join Anya on the road, and see places and things outside of this city. I want—”

“And that’s admirable.” Parker took my face in her hands and lifted it so she could look in my eyes. “It truly is. But what about your happiness?”

“That’s not—”

“I guarantee you that however you plan to end that sentence is not true.” Her tone was steely, stern, something I’d never heard from her, and it killed any other words I planned to say.

I pressed my lips together, eyes wide on her face. She traced the tender skin beneath my eyes with her thumbs, wiping away any traces of tears. “I’ve gotten to know your brother pretty well, and I feel confident in saying he would not want you to sacrifice your own happiness for his. In fact, I think he’d be pretty pissed about it.”

Despite the ache reverberating through my whole body, I smiled. Parker’s hands slid to my shoulders. I sighed, letting her touch do what she intended, letting myself be soothed.

“I saw you up there, on that stage,” she continued, her voice softer now. “You were brilliant. You were happy.”

“I—” I started, but cut myself off. I couldn’t dispute her. She was right. I was on top of the goddamn world last night. But that didn’t mean—

“When does the band need an answer? Like, a for sure answer?”

I looked her over, widow’s peak to delicate chin, then found her eyes again. Where did you come from? I thought. What did I do to deserve you?

“I, um, don’t actually know,” I admitted, dropping my gaze to my lap, where I’d started fidgeting again.

“Okay. Here’s what we’re gonna do.” She leaned across me, a waft of strawberry hitting my senses, and grabbed her phone from the nightstand. “We’re gonna text Halle, and we’re gonna tell her you’re thinking about it. We’re gonna get a deadline.”

“Parker…”

Whatever I was going to say died when she shot me a look that dared me to argue. My words died, but my libido leapt to life. Bossy Parker was hot.

As she typed out her text, I got to my knees and crossed the space between us, straddling her. Her lips quirked, but she kept typing. Leaning in, I brushed her hair away from her neck with my nose, letting my breath brush her ear. She shivered. I smiled and nipped her earlobe, earning another shiver, followed by a soft whimper. Still, she typed.

“How long,” I whispered into her ear, “is that damn text?”

“Almost done,” she said, voice shaky. I sank my teeth into the base of her neck, and she moaned. “There.” She tossed her phone aside and turned her face to mine.

I let her push me onto my back, opening my mouth beneath hers. As she kissed me, as her hands roved over me, there was an oath in her touch: I see you, it said. I see you and I still want you.

I gave myself over to the crashing waves. The fears and the wants and the hopes and wishes. I let her steer the ship, and I knew she’d get me to solid ground.

28

28 PARKER

FREE FALLIN'

Three hours later, we pried ourselves from Gigi’s bed to forage for food in the kitchen. After we ate bowls of cereal while standing at the counter in our underwear—a perk of her roommate being away on a business trip—we made our way into the living room.

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