Page 53 of Between the Paragraphs

I’ll allow myself to feel bad today. I deserve it. After this, I’ll pick up the pieces and figure out what comes next. Whatever it is will be great. I have no doubt about it. I’m a fierce woman and there’s nothing I can’t do when I want it bad enough. Time truly does heal all wounds. This situation is no different. It’s rough for now, but at least it can only get better from here.

Chapter Twenty-three

Mason

It’s been nearly three months since Maria betrayed me. I’m frustrated at how much I miss her, at how many times I’ve gotten in my vehicle wanting to drive to her place. She owes me answers. I cringe as I think this because she did try to talk to me . . . and I froze her out. My own stubbornness has kept me from going to her, from asking her why.

I tell myself it doesn’t matter. She wanted something out of me, and she got it. There’s nothing else to say. Life’s moved on. The article came down. I’m sure it was Miles’s and my lawyer threatening them. I don’t care why, I’m just glad it’s not there for the world to see. Then again, once something shows up online, it’s there forever, even if it is taken down. Someone out there still has copies of it.

It doesn’t really matter, though, as there’s always current news to overtake the old. A lot more interesting things have been posted since that article, and my brother and I are old news now.

I’m currently hanging with my friends at the club, trying to drown out my frustration with alcohol and laughter. Currently a curvy blonde, one of my usual distractions, is hanging off of me, giggling at every single thing I say. I can’t even remember her name and she’s annoying me far more than interesting me. I’m simply going through the motions right now with a painted on smile. I don’t feel any of this.

I feel the shift in the atmosphere before I look up. I tense as I see my buddy Bentz walking up to our group, a smile on his face. He clearly doesn’t feel the instant tension at his side as Nikki stares me down, daggers shooting from her eyes. It doesn’t take long for the conversation to dim, the only sound left, the obnoxious giggle from the blonde who won’t let me go.

“Hello, Bentz,” I say, not addressing Nikki. She’s Maria’s best friend and there’s no way she doesn’t know what her bestie is doing. She has no right glaring at me. I’m the one who was betrayed.

“Hey, bud, haven’t seen you out in a while,” Bentz says. He turns and his smile falls as he sees the fury on Nikki’s face. “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not. I didn’t know he’d be here,” she says through gritted teeth. Bentz finally clues in to this situation. His eyes widen.

“We can head out,” he says, looking torn. She suddenly smiles at Bentz.

“Oh no, I’m not running away, not when he’s the one who should be hiding his head in shame,” she says, her voice syrupy sweet. I’ve had enough.

“I was the one who was betrayed,” I snap.

Nikki glares at me again. “You were never good enough for Maria, and never will be.” She looks at the blonde who’s finally realized the atmosphere’s shifted. Nikki smirks at me. “I hope you’re plagued by diseases from all of your bimbos.”

The blonde’s mouth gapes open as her smile falls. I glare back at Nikki. “What in the hell? Your friend is the one who betrayed me.”

Nikki’s face twists with disgust. “You’re such an idiot, Mason. You threw away the best thing that ever happened to you. She was in love with you, and you threw her away like trash. She doesn’t ever give her heart to anyone, and you were the unfortunate one she did. I almost feel sorry for you because she’s just fine while you’ll surely spiral out of control.”

“Of course she’s fine. She won,” I thunder.

Nikki shakes her head. “You aren’t even worth talking to.” She leans over and says something to Bentz, then turns and walks away. Good. I don’t want her here glaring at me all night. I also don’t want to be the one to leave. These are my friends. She’s the intruder.

Bentz is now glaring at me, something I’m not used to at all. Women never come between us. Once a team, always a team. It seems he doesn’t agree with that in this moment though. The rest of the guys look back and forth between us. No one will choose sides here. We don’t do that and it keeps us stronger. We’ll defend each other to anyone outside of the group every day of the week, but if there’s a squabble within the group, we’re left on our own to work it out.

“You do know Maria quit her company, right? She had no idea what was going on. You know we don’t interfere in each other’s relationships, but man, you’re wrong on this one. Maria’s a great woman and you didn’t give her a chance to explain herself. She has a new company now that’s she’s started from the ground up. It wasn’t her who wrote that article. You’d know this if you’d made a couple of calls.” He shakes his head in disappointment.

“When?” I gasp.

“The day after the article came out. She went in demanding answers. It was a hell of a mess, and the publishing house is going down. They had an entire walkout after Maria on the same day. They can’t get anyone to come work for them. Authors are refusing to renew as well. They won’t recover from this, and it’s all because of who Maria is and her taking the first step and leading by example.”

The room begins spinning as Bentz’s words sink in. I push the blonde away from me, not able to stand her touch another second longer. I feel like I’m a cheater, something I’ve never been before. No, I haven’t slept with her, haven’t slept with anyone since Maria. I just haven’t been able to, but I’ve allowed this other woman to hang on me.

“I’m an idiot,” I whisper. Bentz nods along with a few of the other guys. I shake my head before lowering it, wondering if there’s any way I can fix this. I don’t see how. Maria was just as much of a victim of this as I was, more so even. Instead of being there for her, I turned my back and left her to deal with this on her own. She has every right not to forgive me.

“What are you going to do about it?” Kevin asks.

“I have no idea,” I admit.

“Groveling might be a good first step,” Nathan suggests.

I give a humorless laugh. “There’s no doubt about that. It needs to be more though.”

“Yeah, you better figure it out. We all like her,” Tom says.

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