“Thank you. I was hoping I might be able to crash on your couch for a few weeks? I can’t afford to rent a place on my own, so I just need time to find a roommate who won’t murder me in my sleep.”
“Is that all? Of course you can stay at my place. Shit, you can take my room and I’ll sleep at Liam’s.” It wasn’t like she and Liam were spending nights apart these days.
“Thank you. Seriously. I owe you big time.” Rose breathed a sigh of relief.
Jazz narrowed her eyes, Rose’s request sinking in. She still lived at home with their parents, the drive to school less than an hour. “Why are you moving out so suddenly? Do you want to be closer to school for the new semester or something?”
Rose sipped her flat white before answering, her voice shaky. “I got kicked out.”
“Of med school?”
She shook her head. “No. But I did drop out of school. Mom and Dad found out and kicked me out. I’m not allowed to step foot in their house until I re-enroll, which I couldn’t do even if I wanted to.”
Holy shit. Of all the things she’d expected, Rose dropping out of school hadn’t crossed her mind. “How did they find out?”
“You know Kami’s terrible mother-in-law?”
“Unfortunately.” Xander’s best friend, Kami, had more of a monster-in-law than a mother-in-law. She despised Xan, and she didn’t seem to be a particular fan of Kami either.
“She saw me on a date and overheard me talking about dropping out. Not only did she tell Mom and Dad about school, but she also outed me as a lesbian, so that’s great.”
Jazz was significantly less surprised to learn her sister was a lesbian than to find out she’d dropped out of med school. “Jesus. Tell me they didn’t give you shit for that,” she said. Her parents had rolled their eyes when she’d come out as pansexual in high school, but they never seemed to have a problem with it. Nor had they had a problem with Xan being bi; in fact, her parents had both been devastated when he’d broken up with his first boyfriend, because he was a baker and always brought dessert when he came over for dinner.
“They didn’t care about that,” Rose confirmed. “I mean, they’re pretty shitty parents, but at least they’re not homophobic, I suppose.”
“It’s something. God, Rosie, I’m so sorry. Why did you drop out?”
“I’ve never wanted to be a doctor.” Rose shrugged, and she looked lighter just talking about it. “I only went to med school because they wanted me to. Remember last summer when I got a job in that lab?”
“Sure. Infectious disease research or something, right?”
Rose huffed a laugh. “Something like that. Well, I loved it. Like really, really loved it. And they loved me. They offered me a full-time job at the end of the summer, but I couldn’t take it because of school. So they said they’d call in a few months to see if I changed my mind, and they did, in March. I was in the middle of studying for finals and just completely miserable. So I withdrew from all my classes and I took the job. I started in May.”
“Shit, good for you. Are you happy?”
A smile spread over Rose’s face. “So happy. I love it. The pay isn’t great right now, but it’ll go up a lot once I pass the two-year mark, and the benefits are decent. And they’re willing to pay for me to get my masters in a couple of years. But mostly, I just really love the work.”
“I assume Mom and Dad didn’t care about that when you told them?”
“No.” Her smile fell away. “Even if I do get my masters, they’re not interested unless I have Dr. in front of my name.”
“Assholes.”
Rose laughed, but it sounded more pained than anything else. “Yeah, well, they’ve always been assholes. They pushed and pushed me and now they’re surprised that I might want a little control over my own life. I’ve always been so jealous of you, you know.”
“Jealous of me?” Jazz asked, gaping at her? “Why on earth would you be jealous of me?” Rose was the prettier sister, the skinnier sister, the smarter sister, the more successful sister. The easier, better, less disappointing sister.
But Rose looked just as confused as Jazz felt. “Are you kidding? Xan and I are both so jealous of you, Jazz. You’re your own person, you’re fun, and you have a life outside of this family. You’ve never given a shit about Mom and Dad’s expectations. I wish I could be like you.”
God, she’d done a good job of faking it, hadn’t she?
“It’s not real,” she said, running her finger over the handle of her cup. “I give a shit. Like a lot. Sure, I don’t try with them anymore, but it’s kind of really fucked me up, actually, how much I give a shit.”
“Oh.” Surprise flashed over Rose’s face, but she quickly schooled her expression into something fierce. “Maybe that part’s not real, but the rest is. You are your own person, and no one can take that away from you. Not even them.” She took a deep breath, shaking her head. “I thought it was better to just give in to them. To just try to be good enough. I thought that one day, I would finally be good enough.”
She looked away and Jazz’s stomach twisted as she realized Rose was wiping her face. “You had the right idea not to try. I don’t know what the hell they want, but it’s not us. It was never us.”
Jazz loved her parents. For a long time she’d resented them, she’d begrudged them, but she’d never hated them. Not until she watched her sister wiping away tears, thinking she wasn’t enough.