Page 74 of Angel

“How did you…” Angel trails off, gaze lowered as he pokes at a few of the last hash browns on his plate. “When you moved out, how did you… you know?”

“How did I survive?” I clarify, keeping my tone light and teasing. I know what he’s asking. How did I do it? How did I break away from everything that was familiar and set up my own life without the support of family and the neighborhood?

It’s not something that happens back there. People don’t up and leave. You grow up there, get married there, have kids there, and the cycle never ends.

The pink on Angel’s ears darkens. “No, I mean, well, actually, yeah, kinda?”

“Simple. I didn’t fit. They didn’t really want me around. So it was a win-win situation.” I flick my wrist, like I’m waving off an annoying fly. That’s what it felt like sometimes. Getting out of the neighborhood was like finally killing the incessant buzzing in my ears.

Angel’s brow furrows. “It was that easy?”

I chuckle. “Well, no, I said it was simple, but it wasn’t easy. I started camming to support myself. You know, just my dick, my hand, and my phone. I’d throw a few dildos in there sometimes.” I smile at the memory of the early days, trying to figure out how to get the right angles, how to upload the damn videos…

“It was only supposed to be a temporary thing to help pay rent and cover the bills until I could support myself with dancing. But then, the porn took off and there was no way I could make as much as a dancer, so…” I shrug, then continue, “Plus, it’s a really welcoming environment. I know that sounds weird, but I’ve never had anyone in the industry look at me strangely or say anything hurtful. It’s surprisingly inclusive and respectful.”

Angel’s ears have faded to a mostly normal shade of pink. His expression is thoughtful, with a hint of curiosity and a dash of wistfulness. “Your family doesn’t know, do they?”

Laughter bursts from me at the thought of my parents finding out how I’ve been supporting myself for the better part of the past decade. “Oh god, no, can you imagine? They’d have aneurysms. I think Nico knows, though. He’s never asked me about it, and I never mention it. But he’s always had this… ‘I’m cool with whatever, I just don’t want the details’ thing with me.”

Angel nods in understanding. “Nico’s a good guy.”

“Yeah, he is.”

We fall silent with me watching Angel while he’s lost in his thoughts. There’s so much longing in his eyes, but for once I can’t read any more than that. What is he longing for? What does he want? I want to give it to him. I want to shower him with every good thing he could possibly desire.

If only he’d let me, I would give him everything.

CHAPTER

TWENTY-SIX

ANGEL

After we finish breakfast, I collect our empty plates and stash them in the sink for later. Then Rhys drags me back to his room and onto the bed.

“Have you ever thought about moving away?” he asks after we’re snuggled under the covers together. Our faces are inches apart and our limbs are all tangled together.

The question takes me aback. I’ve thought about moving away about as much as I’ve thought about jumping out of a plane. “Where would I go?”

“Anywhere!” He gives me a gentle poke in the side.

Anywhere sounds terrifying. Anywhere might as well be nowhere, some nameless place with faceless people. It might as well be a haunted town with ghosts and zombies and monsters.

I scrunch up my nose. “I can count on my hands the number of times I’ve left the tri-state area.”

Rhys’s jaw drops, and my ears tingle with heat. I’m a homebody—everyone knows that. What reason would I have to go somewhere else when everyone I’ve ever known is right here?

“Seriously? What’s the farthest you’ve been?”

I think for a second. I went up north of the city once for a football game in high school. And out to Long Island for a job once. I’ve done weekend trips out to the Jersey Shore with the guys… “Atlantic City?”

“Huh, Nico had his bachelor party there.”

My ears heat even more. “Yeah, that’s when I went.”

Rhys leans in and gives me a kiss on the lips. A single, hard press as he wiggles himself deeper into my arms. He wraps himself around me like an octopus and I never want him to let go.

“Where would you want to go? If you could go anywhere? Not permanently, just for a vacation,” he asks, barely whispering, brushing his nose back and forth across mine.

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