Page 108 of Nikolai (Kansas City Reapers)

Honesty often wasn’t easy. Sometimes, it was damn near impossible to find. But I had never been more certain that honesty really was the best policy.

Chapter 26

Maddy

However I’d thoughtthis day would end, this was the furthest thing from my mind. But as Niko’s lips met mine in the sweetest and most heart-wrenching kiss imaginable, I knew I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

The struggle had been real between us these past two days, but this… this is where I wanted to be. More than anywhere else in the world.

My lips opened under his gentle pressure, our tongues tasting each other with a gentleness and a reverence that articulated our feelings perfectly, without either of us needing to say a word.

Pulling me into his arms, he kissed me passionately. I felt a thousand emotions passing from his lips to mine. Hands touched, lips kissed, and our bodies began to speak words that were barely touched on in our conversation. Our bodies spoke a language that words just simply could not.

As sweet understanding and adoration gave way to the intense heat of passion, I gave in to his aggression, letting him take the lead. Every step he took, both literally and figuratively, I matched. One step forward from him, one step back from me, until my back pressed up against the cool wall.

“What is it with you and pressing me against walls?” I asked him, my words teasing against his lips. He nipped at my lower lip. I couldn’t hold back my whimper as the stress and pain of the day melted away into the first real flutters of arousal and desire.

“I can’t help it. You look so good under my control.” The low, growling timbre of his voice vibrated against my chest. His lips claimed mine again, this time not holding back. Lips opened, tongues tasted, and my mind spun with pure, unadulterated arousal.

A strong hand slid down my body, gripping under my thigh. My hips arched, grinding into him as he pulled my leg up, wrapping it around his hip as his thrusts met mine.

“I need you, Maddy,” he whispered against my lips. His words were needy, guttural, and almost growling in his need for me. A need that matched my own for him. Pressed together, almost heart to heart, I felt his pulse thundering away in his chest, in almost perfect synchronicity with my own.

“Maddy? I thought my name was princess,” I teased, smiling against his lips.

I could not get enough of him. My body was ravenous for his particular brand of kinky seduction. Pulling backfrom our kiss, he released my thigh, righting my position once more.

My brow furrowed in confusion as he stepped away from me, just enough for me to feel the desperation tug at me, willing me to go to him again, to reconnect our bodies.

“Did I say something wrong?” I asked, worry beginning to roll and tumble in my stomach.

“No, no, you didn’t.” His gentle fingers toyed with a tendril of my hair, pushing it back behind my ear with a tenderness that belied the passion we had only just begun to taste together again.

His eyes lifted to the bandage on my temple, his fingers touching the spot with gentle tenderness. His eyes filled with sadness, an almost self-loathing that nearly broke my heart.

My hand touched his.

“Niko, it’s—” Suddenly his hand pulled back, his eyes moving away from me, as though he couldn’t bear to look at me.

“Maddy, I can’t do this…” he muttered through clenched teeth, stopping as he searched for words. Hands fisted at his sides, he turned away from me. My heart dropped clear down into my stomach. Regret and pain sparking deep in my chest again.

“Oh… I see.”I pulled away, wrapping my arms around myself. It was a feeble attempt at self-preservation, but it was something. “I’m just going to…” I trailed off, turning on my heel and reaching for the door.

“Chyort voz’mi, ya chertovski durak.No, Maddy. Wait.” He was behind me in the space of five seconds, hishand on mine as he stopped me from opening the door. “You don’t understand.”

“What don’t I understand?” I asked, turning around to face him and wrapping my arms around my chest again.

“Fuck,” he swore quietly under his breath, running a hand through his hair. “Words are hard. Let me try again.”

He grew quiet, his eyes darting back and forth as he searched for the right words. It was hard to do, but a tendril of hope flickered in my chest, and I let it. I didn’t tamp it down. Not yet.

Finally, after a long pause, he turned back to me, taking my hands in his.

“Maddy, I need you. I do. And I want this. All of it. The dynamic, of course, but…”

“But what…” I couldn’t meet his eyes, fear gripping me that he would turn everything back around, rebuking my admission of love and pushing me away again, just as he’d done only a few days ago.

“But Ineedmore. I need this to be between us. Just you and me tonight.”His words, filled with a gripping, almost needy passion, struck me like a tuning fork, reverberating through me from head to toe and back again.

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