Page 81 of Nikolai (Kansas City Reapers)

“No kidding. I’m tired. Good game, Maddy. We should play more games together, yeah?” Sully added, nudging her shoulder as he walked past.

Jax simply stood and waved goodnight to us both, following the other two men up the stairs in silence.

“Don’t mind Jax. He’s a sore loser,” I said quietly. We both sat at the table, an awkwardness settling over the room.

“Yeah, no worries.” She nodded her head slowly. I had no idea why things felt so awkward all of a sudden. The night had been incredible. Hell, the whole day had been. So, why the hell were things so uncomfortable now?

“Well, I should get some sleep,” I finally managed to mutter, stretching a bit, mostly for show.

“Yeah, me too.”

Still, neither of us moved from our seats for a solid minute.

Finally, she rose from her chair, slapping her hands down on the table, a little too loudly. “Okay, well, goodnight then.”

With that, she was gone, heading out of the room and back up the stairs to her own room.

And I was left sitting there like a dumb idiot.

Perfect.

Chapter 20

Nikolai

What the hellwas I doing?

We’d had the perfect day, and what did I do? I went and made it weird and awkward in the eleventh hour — literally. The need to be near her was nearly unbearable. It literally caused me pain, an aching in my chest that I could not seem to soothe in her absence.

Realizing I was still sitting at the table, alone lamenting this feeling, I stood up and made my way up the stairs. I might as well go to bed. Tomorrow would be better. Right?

I walked down the hall to my room, hell-bent on a long shower and going straight to bed. At least in sleep, I could escape these feelings.

Then I remembered that the woman had plagued even my dreams as of late. How was I supposed to get any relief when every moment of my dayandnight seemed to be consumed with thoughts of her?

I paused in the doorway of my room, my handspressing against the door frame. My breath came in short pants as I thought about how I was feeling. What was I doing? She was right there. Only a few short feet away down the hall. What was the point of going to bed alone, of tossing and turning all night with thoughts of her, when I could just go to her? Right now.

Would that be too much? Was it too presumptuous?

I realized at that moment that the issue wasn’t being around Maddy. It was the fact that I didn’t just want kink. I didn’t want to dominate her. Not right now. Not after today. Something inside of me wanted more. And, for once, I could not deny myself.

Coming to a decision in the moment, I turned on my heel and marched towards her room. I didn’t want princess, I wanted Maddy. And I was going to go to her, even if I didn’t fully understand the why of it yet.

Striding to her door, I knocked softly.

There was a rustling behind the door before she opened it, just a little.

“Hello? Niko?” she asked, her brow furrowed in confusion.

I took a deep breath.

“May I come in?” I asked softly.

“Uh, yeah. Sure.” She opened the door, waving me in. I shut the door behind me, locking it without a second thought.

“Did you, um, need something?” she asked, almost awkwardly. She had taken her hair out of her braid, the loose waves falling around her shoulders, and she tucked a strand behind her ear, almost as a nervous gesture.

“Yeah.” I sighed heavily, unsure of what I was doing here, or what I wanted to do next.

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