“That makes me happy,” Mom said. “You sound, I don’t know, different somehow. Almost... lighter.”
“I feel different,” I confessed quietly. I’d come here feeling like I didn’t belong anywhere, like I didn’t know who the hell I was, but I was slowly getting to know myself with each passing day. What I liked and what I disliked—not what I pretended to care about because it was what was popular at the moment. I was getting to know me. And I was liking the version of myself I was discovering. She was a hell of a lot better than the girl I’d been back in L.A.
We chatted for a few more minutes. I told her about my foray into horseback riding and my determination to learn to drive one of the ranch trucks. I talked about my growing friendships with Ivy and Lennix while she filled me in on everything happening with her and my dad. The one topic I made sure to steer clear of was anything having to do with Zach. Especially the kiss he’d so easily disregarded the morning after it had happened. Like he said, it was never happening again. I filed it away with all the other stupid things I’d done in the past, and I was determined to move on and forget it ever happened. So far, my plan to do that consisted of avoiding the man in question like the plague.
“Well, I don’t want to keep you longer than I already have. Sounds like you were in the middle of something when I called, so I’ll let you get back to your cooking,” she finally said.
“Call again soon, Mom. And give Dad my love, will you? I miss you both like crazy.”
“We miss you too, honey. So much.” There was a slight pause before she asked, “I love you; you know that, right?”
“Of course I do, Mom.” My voice came out raspy, full of emotion. “I’ve always known that. Never doubted it for a second.”
There was a gust of air through the line as though she let out a breath of relief. “Good. That’s good.”
“And I love you too. Both of you. Very much. I’m sorry if it ever felt like I took that for granted.” I had taken it for granted. I’d taken so much for granted. But not anymore.
We disconnected, and I stuffed my phone back into my pocket, but before I could get back to work on the dish I’d been trying to perfect, someone knocked on the door to my cabin.
I whipped around, my heart in my throat at the idea that it could be Zach on the other side. I’d been doing my best over the past couple of days to pretend he didn’t exist. It was easier said than done, especially since I was back to ranch-hand work, but I’d made sure to stick close to Hal the past two days, getting my assignments and such from him.
Before I had a chance to freak out too badly, the person on the other side called out. “I know you’re in there, Rae. I can smell the burned efforts of your cooking.” My shoulders sank in relief at the sound of Lennix’s voice. “Open up. I’ve got Ivy with me, and we have wine,” she finished in a singsong voice.
I rushed to the door, throwing it open. “You should have led with that,” I teased, waving the two of them in.
Lennix moved right to me, quickly pulling me into a hug before letting go and heading for the kitchen. Ivy followed after her, her nose scrunching up at the smell as she leaned in to place a kiss on my cheek. “What were you trying to make this time?” she asked as she grabbed hold of the door and swung it open and closed like she was trying to air the space out. “Maybe I’ll leave this open for a few minutes.”
I took the bottle of wine she offered with a laugh and followed after Lennix into my kitchen where she’d already pulled out three wineglasses—a purchase from my second trip into town, that time with Lennix to assure I wasn’t left behind again.
“I was trying to make German pancakes.”
“Aw, I love Dutch babies!” Lennix declared enthusiastically. Her smile fell a second later as she looked at my stovetop. “Uh, babe. Aren’t you supposed to have an oven to make those?”
I shrugged as I pulled the cork from the wine bottle and poured three generously-sized glasses. “That’s what the recipe said, but I thought I could try and find a work-around by cooking them a little longer on the stovetop.”
Ivy took the glass I offered her and sipped, one brow rising with a humorous look. “And how’d that work out for you?”
I shot her a flat look over my shoulder as I pulled out all the fancy cheeses I’d grabbed at the grocery store, finally excited to have a use for them. “You smell it in here, don’t you?” I also grabbed some fresh fruit and some cured meats I’d gotten as well. I might not be able to cook yet, but I could whip together a charcuterie board better than anyone else. If I had a resume, I would have listed it under one of my special skills.
“You know, if you want to keep practicing, you’re welcome to come over and use my stove any time.”
I looked at her with wide eyes. “Really, you wouldn’t mind?”
She lifted her shoulders in a casual shrug as she popped a cube of BellaVitano into her mouth. “Of course. I’ll open all the windows beforehand.” She dodged the cracker I threw at her head with a laugh. “I’m kidding! But seriously, you’re welcome anytime. Just text me.”
“I appreciate that.” I nibbled nervously on my bottom lip as I took a seat in one of the chairs at the kitchen table. “I’m on the calendar to cook dinner for all the staff and hands next week, and I want to be able to cook without risk of burning down the kitchen and make something that won’t give everyone food poisoning.” My expression fell. “It would be my luck that the ranch would fall into dire straits when no one was able to work because they were all deathly ill from my cooking.”
Ivy took the chair across from me while Lennix hopped up on the countertop across from me. I might not have had much in way of seating, but my new friends made it work.
“You’ll do fine,” Ivy assured me. “And we’re more than happy to help if you need us. Just say the word.”
“I appreciate the offer, but this is really something I want to do myself.” I stared at the table top as I dragged my finger along the designs made by the woodgrain. “I’ve never really had to do anything for myself before. It was all done for me growing up,” I admitted, a large dose of shame making my cheeks and the tips of my ears turn red.
I hadn’t really gotten into all the reasons I’d been sent to the ranch in the first place, and I would have been lying if I said I wasn’t worried about what Lennix and Ivy might think of me once they learned the truth.
Lennix eyed me thoughtfully over the rim of her wineglass as she took a drink, and as I waited out her silence, my anxiety grew.
“We know why you’re here, Rae,” she said, her statement taking me off guard and causing my chin to jerk back.