Page 112 of Tipping Point

He holds up his hands, palms open, when I start to speak.

“I know, Cam. I know that this isn’t your style, but I have to make the offer before I leave.”

“What?”

“I’m retiring.”

I’m speechless. “Dixon, this has been your dream since I’ve known you.”

“Dreams change, Cam. You’re allowed to change your mind about what you want.” He says this intently, vehemently.

“I’m sorry, of course-”

“I don’t mean me!” he interrupts me, throwing his hands in the air. “I mean you.”

“What about me?”

Dixon groans and shakes his head.

“Will you at least think about it?” he insists. “I don’t think you realize what you achieved here. Much of the footage you’ve submitted so far has offered great insight into the Prima Grande world. It’s a very distinct style. You could actually make a difference here.”

“Dix, I-”

“Before you say no.” He gives a booming laugh. “The salary will reflect the appreciation of WebFlix Max.”

“And what are you going to do?”

Dixon shrugs.

“Please, Cam, at least think about it. You don’t have to decide right away.”

I nod, but I can feel my stomach knot at the thought.

We finish our drinks in companionable silence. The clenching in my gut doesn’t go away. I hate when I feel like this, so full of…regret?

Seeing the crew today, the easy way they fell back into my preferred way of filming. The places I’d been these past few months, the people I’ve met. So much as yet unexplored, unexplained, unappreciated.

Back in Japan, when they had made the offer for the Silk Road project, I had felt that pang of my gut clenching, hadn’t read into it, explained it away as excitement, or nerves.

It never occurred to me that it could be regret.

Since uni I always felt like I could be a voice for the voiceless. That stories matter. And that I would have to sacrifice on a “normal” life if I wanted to tell them. So many possibilities had been sacrificed at the altar of my dreams, Marcus, now maybe this documentary, the life I had imagined with Finn in the past. Would I betray myself, if I walked away from the Silk Road project?

I’m too tired to think about it now. Too drained after today.

When I’m back in my hotel room, I fall back onto the bed and blow my curls out of my face.

Before I know it, I’m asleep.

* * *

CAMILLE

FINNEGAN BRENNAN SIGNS ON FOR TWO YEAR EXTENSION ON CONTRACT WITH DELTA VICTOR.

“Holy shit.” I brush the tangle of curls out of my face. Frown.

I had asked him about this yesterday, and he had licked at his lips. A lie.

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