Page 97 of The Matchmaker and the Marine

She waved her hand and looked down. “I understand, it’s hard to find a way to bring it into a conversation.”

He bowed his head. “I’d like to tell you what happened, and some of this I’ve never shared with anyone, not even Will.”

She clasped her hand over his. It gave him strength.

“When I got to the hospital, I still had my leg, barely. It was severely damaged and the doctor told me from the very beginning I might lose it, but he would save my life.”

He heard her suck in a breath, but she remained silent.

“Those first few days were a haze. I was on a lot of painkillers and I had a concussion. We trained hard for the mission but someone trying to blow you to smithereens isn’t exactly something the Marines can train you for, or what comes after you survive, the initial realization that only some of your people were okay.”

Quietly, Mel said, “You told me you lost soldiers on this mission.”

His eyes sought hers. “There was one man, they’d just had a new baby. He hadn’t even held her yet.” He could feel the tears threatening to fall. “But each life that was taken had a similar story. People who loved them.” He could hear the catch in his voice. “Once I was stable enough to be flown back to the States, I was relieved. My military career was gone and all I wanted was to get home.” He dropped his head. “That was after.”

Gently she said, “After what?”

“I developed an infection and it was overtaking my body. The doctor said they had to amputate my leg below the knee to save my life.”

“Do you think he knew right from the beginning?”

Adam shook his head. “The odds were never in my favor, but I’m confident the doctor did all he could. He had seen so many of these types of injuries and understood that it was a physical challenge, but the emotional impact was just as hard.”

Mel’s voice quivered when she asked, “Were you alone? When it happened?”

“I was lucky. Will had flown over to be with me. He was my rock. I don’t know if I would have made it without his support.”

“I’m glad you had him.” Tears slipped silently down her cheeks. He wanted to brush them away. But not yet. He needed to get out what he wanted to say.

“After I was stateside, I went to a rehab clinic. I had to learn how to walk again and deal with the PTSD. That’s when Anita came back into the picture.” His words rushed out. “I had physical therapy every day, along with the shrink I was pretty busy. One day I was in the PT room, walking between the lateral bars. I was pushing myself, determined. When I looked up she was standing in the doorway watching me. I’ll never forget that moment, the look of pity she wore. I could tell from her eyes I wasn’t the man she wanted any longer.”

“Oh Adam,” she cried, “I’m sure you misread the situation.”

“It doesn’t matter. She stayed around for a couple of weeks in South Carolina, but then she made an excuse that she had to get back to the West Coast. After that her phone calls slowed and pretty soon it was a sporadic text or email.”

“I thought she just left?”

“That wasn’t the whole truth. I didn’t want you to know what really happened. I flew out there. I had to know if we still had anything between us.” He could hear the bitterness creep into his voice. “She was at our favorite restaurant, one with outdoor seating. I stopped by to pick up dinner for two and that’s when I saw her. On a date.”

“Did she see you?”

“Yeah, she ran after me, telling me it wasn’t what it looked like. I did her a favor and told her I was coming to break up with her in person. She was free to have the life I knew she wanted.”

She squeezed his hand tighter. “I’m so sorry. That had to have been agony for you. You should have told me.”

He withdrew his hand. “What’s done is done.”

“That doesn’t explain why you kept it a secret from me.”

He could tell she really didn’t get it. “I couldn’t bear to have another woman pity me. Especially not you.” His voice dropped.

She visibly shrank. “We all have scars, Adam. Yours happen to be external as well as internal, but you should know by now that we’re a lot alike. My scars are hidden from everyone. I didn’t share my past with anyone. Until you.”

Her voice was filled with sadness and it broke his heart to know that she was right. Out of all the people he had met, she would never have judged him, just as he understood why she closed herself off.

He asked, “We make quite a pair, don’t we?”

“How did you expect to have a relationship with me and keep this a secret?”

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