Page 14 of Hayes

“You hurt me. I came looking for you, begged my parents to give me at least a year to try and find you. They gave me six months, and you were nowhere to be found.” His hand drifted to her neck again.

“I spent months in bed- “His voice dropped to a strained whisper. “I couldn’t function, did not go out in public because you left.” His fingers tightened around her throat. “You love me. What we shared when we were teens was something that could never be forgotten, not like that. Now answer the question.”

“I do, but it does not matter. We cannot go back because the damage was too great. And you are involved–”

“I never stopped loving you," he told her quietly.

“Don’t do this," she whispered.

“We can start–” “

“No!” She tried to push him away. “You don’t know what you are saying. When I had the miscarriage, I was sick for more than a month and I thought I was going to die. They told me it was going to be impossible for me to have a child.” Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself. “I have resigned myself to not having children–”he blinked at the tears.

“I am resigned to being alone–”

“Stop it!” he ordered, shaking her slightly. “You can get a second opinion–”

“No. Hayes, please let go of me. I am not doing this. It’s over and done. Marry Simone. You are going to need an heir and she seems like a nice enough person. What we had was over.” She pushed out of his hold and hurried toward her things.

Chapter 4

He intercepted her just as she made it to the door and stood there, blocking her exit.

“What are you doing?”

“You ran away once before; I am not letting you do it again. You tore us apart, Cammy, and for what?”

“Move out of my way.”

“No. I love you–”

“Don’t!”

“I love you," he repeated in a determined voice. She reared back when he reached for her, but he clamped his hands on her arms, keeping her still. “I have always loved you and always will. I did everything possible to get over you.

Took women to my bed, too many to count, I drank and contemplated using drugs but never got around to doing that. Nothing worked. I stayed away from black women because they reminded me of you.

But it made no difference. You were etched on my brain, in my blood, and I could not remove you. I tried. I did, and when I had sex, I had to keep my eyes open because if they were closed, I would see you–”His hands crept up to her face. “It was always you, and I am not letting you go again.”

“We can’t go back," she whispered, her body trembling.

“Then let’s go forward.”

“Hayes, please, I cannot do this. You don’t understand.” In her effort to plead with him, she spread her hands on his chest, jolting as the warmth of his skin was felt through his clothing.

“I have nightmares, terrible ones, and coming back here has brought them back. I am just trying to find my way, I am damaged, and I cannot be with anyone, not even you. You said you used women to forget us—what we were, but I could not bear for anyone to touch me, a man’s touch revolts me, so I couldn’t do it–” She heaved out a breath.

“You have been the only one and I—sex is distasteful to me, I cannot–”Her voice trailed away, the breath backing up inside her throat. “I can’t. It’s no use, and I am asking you to let me go.”

His heart shuddered at the pain in her voice, but the import of the words she said hit him like a ton of bricks.

He was the only man for her. Even after all these years, he had been the only man who had the privilege of making love to her. Of feeding on those lush and sweet nipples of hers. Of driving into the tightness that had wrapped around him like a glove.

He had been with many women, even before they were together. When he was a teen, girls had offered themselves to him and he had not refused. After he met her, she had been the only one for him because he could not bear to look at another.

After she left and his heart had shattered inside his chest, he had tried to seek solace with other women, and it never worked. Now she was back; now they had established that she still loved him; there was no way in hell he was going to step aside and let her go. He couldn’t do it.

“We’ll take it slow–”

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