Page 144 of Emerald Malice

His desperate eyes meet mine. “You’re exiling me?”

“A little rough living won’t kill you. In fact, it might finally make a man out of you.” I start to walk away as Viktor makes an attempt to sit up again. My vors close in on him, but I know they’ll wait for my command.

“Andrey!” Viktor screams. “Andrey! You can’t do this.”

“You can begin,” I tell my men from the doorway. “Just don’t kill him.”

I let the door fall shut on Viktor’s hysterical screams.

51

NATALIA

The pain pulls at me like quicksand. I’m waist-deep in it, but I don’t have the energy to fight. Part of me doesn’t even want to.

Make it end, I think. I don’t want to hurt anymore.

Then there’s a furry muzzle pressing into my side, reminding me he’s still with me even hours later. The gentle murmurs of familiar voices. Light and darkness folding into one another, shadows that come in waves, then flow back out again.

Pain and grief. Mila and Misha and Andrey.

Crippling anxiety until I can barely breathe. Leonty and Shura and Andrey.

Depression so dark I can’t see through it to the other side. And Andrey.

And Andrey.

And Andrey.

“Has she eaten anything today?”

I want to ask him, How long have I been like this? But my mouth won’t obey.

“I managed to feed her some soup,” Mila responds, her voice coming to me through a haze I can’t dispel. “And, like, half a sandwich. Ish.”

“Take Remi outside. He needs a walk.” Andrey’s voice is as commanding as ever, but there’s an edge to it that reminds me of shattering glass.

“Remi won’t move off her bed. I tried this morning. He refuses to leave her side.”

“Get Misha. Remi will move for him.”

Eventually, the soft, furry weight at my side disappears. Good. He’ll need some fresh air. They both do.

Everyone is taken care of. They don’t need me. Maybe everyone would be better off if?—

“Okay, lastochka,” Andrey whispers in my ear. “It’s time to come back now.”

His hands move gently over my body, and there isn’t a single part of me that is scared. His touch is soothing and gentle. Nothing like?—

No.

It hurts too much to think about. It’s easier to forget.

But Andrey won’t let me. He peels away my clothes like he’s afraid I might crumble, and passes a hot towel over my body. It fills me with an aching tranquility.

Life can’t be all bad if there are moments like this sprinkled in, can it?

For the first time in too long to remember, I open my eyes.

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