Page 18 of Here In Your Arms

My eyes are on the ground, but I can feel the tears pricking the back of my eyes. I’m determined to not cry. I don’t want to make it worse. Despite my best efforts, I feel one escape and he sighs at the sight, like I’ve disappointed him.

“E, I wouldn’t be so hard on you if you just stopped doing stupid things, you know that right?” he says, gently.

I nod, afraid to use my voice. He pulls me into him, a semblance of a hug, and holds me there briefly. He rubs my back tenderly and I feel my muscles relax a bit. This is the version of him I like, when he shows me how much he really does love me.

“Just do better and this won’t happen, okay?”

“What the fuck are you doing?” I ask him. In my head I sound tough, but I’m pretty sure my words come across shaky.

“We need to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to you. We are done.”

“No, we’re not. I’m giving you time and space, but you are mine.”

“You need to let go, Nathan, before I start yelling,” I warn him.

“Look, you need to know that I’ve never given up on us. We are end game and I promise I’m here for you. I want us to be together.”

“No, we’re done. I don’t understand how to get this through your head. Stop coming here, stop staring at me, just stop!” I hiss at him and yank my arm away.

“Poor E, thinking you can walk away from me. Without me, you’re nothing,” he says lowly, ensuring I’m the only one who hears it.

It takes everything I have to not trip as I walk away. His words haunt me, and it takes more than I thought I had in me to focus and not get sucked into a memory. I didn’t realize he wants me back that badly, and it’s shaken me. Turning to the bar patrons, I see a gorgeous woman waiting patiently. Her long black hair is piled on her head and her piercing blue eyes exude friendliness.

“Hi, how can I help you?” I ask her.

“Hey, I uh, I would like a mojito please.”

“No problem,” I tell her, and gather the ingredients to get mixing.

“I do have a question,” she says a little softly, so I lean in to try to hear better.

“Yeah, what’s up?”

“Was that guy bothering you?”

“Oh, uh, no, it’s fine,” I tell her quickly.

She looks steadily at me, and I can see the disbelief on her face. I go out of my way to avoid eye contact; it’s like she can see through me. Has she been where I am? Trapped by an abusive ex who isn’t truly gone?

“If you need anything, and I’m here, never hesitate to ask. Like, I know you don’t know me, but I saw him grab you, then your face got all pale, and that’s not cool.”

I smile at her genuine offer, my heart feeling warmed. “Thanks, but I’ve got backup. My boss is never far, and Tim’s got my back. I feel like I’ve seen you before. Do you come here often?” I ask her.

“You hittin’ on me?” she asks, mirth in her eyes.

I realize what I said and start laughing as I pour her drink into a class, adding a sprig of mint. She laughs softly along with me, putting me more at ease.

“Well, you’re a good lookin’ girl, but I prefer hot dogs to tacos,” I tell her.

She throws her head back, laughing hard. “Yeah, friends and I come around a lot. They’d definitely like you.”

“My name’s Rory,” I tell her on a whim.

“Morgan,” she says, grinning.

“Well, Morgan, I’m here every weekend. It would be fun to see you once in a while.”

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