Page 74 of Here In Your Arms

The server comes by with a tray full of shots for the table. They get passed around and I eye mine critically. It’s awfully colorful, which immediately makes me suspicious. The fruity ones usually pack the biggest punch. Morgan nudges my shoulder with hers.

“Just drink it. I promise we won’t take advantage of you. Unless you want us to.”

A laugh escapes me as I roll my eyes and all the girls raise their shot glasses. I raise mine to mimic the moment.

“To friends, new and old, unexpected, and badass,” Charli says.

“And to bitches!” Courtney chimes in.

We all laugh before downing the shots. Not bad, honestly. I was a little more worried it would taste strong, so now it’s just a matter of making sure I pace myself.

“Do you guys always toast?” I ask.

Charli groans and rolls her eyes, but Courtney cracks up.

“Courtney and my brothers made up these rules about doing a cheers, so now it’s a thing and usually I only make them when it’s just them, but it felt right for tonight since we have you now.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“She means you’re part of the group now,” Olivia says like it’s common knowledge.

I’m sure my face looks as bewildered as I feel because they’re all staring at me with small smiles.

“Just go with it. They tend to adopt friends like we’re candy,” Morgan says, smiling.

“Usually our other friend, Amy, is the one who really can vibe out who we’re going to add, but I’ve got a good feeling,” Olivia explains.

An overwhelming feeling washes over me, and I’m not sure if it’s good or not. My face feels hot, but I can feel my mouth smiling too. Maybe it won’t be so bad. Maybe these girls are the real deal. It would be nice to have some friends again. Courtney picks up the conversation after a moment of slightly uncomfortable silence and Charli looks over at me.

“Anxiety?” she asks bluntly.

“What?”

“You look uncomfortable. I wanted to see if you deal with anxiety too. Mine gets bad sometimes, but it’s been better with some counseling and medication adjustments.”

“Why would you tell me all that?”

She smiles kindly. “Because you look as overwhelmed as I sometimes feel, so I figured I would ask. You don’t have to answer, but I’m pretty open about my anxiety.”

I look at her for a second, trying to decide if she’s being sincere. There’s no reason to think she’s not being sincere, but I know firsthand how easy it is to be fooled. Her face is open and kind, and she gives me a little reprieve by taking a sip of her water while I process her words.

Well, nothing good ever came from inaction.

“Uh, depression.”

Charli nods and takes another drink, making a point not to rush the conversation, which I’m grateful for.

“I’m used to people taking off when they realize how bad it can get.”

Charli gives me a rueful smile. “I’m used to pushing people away before they can leave me, kind of on the opposite side of the social spectrum.”

I am genuinely baffled by this information. The only time I’ve been able to push someone away is when I left Nathan, and even that was more running than pushing.

“Why would you push someone away?”

“If I end things before they start, I don’t get hurt.”

“I can understand that.”

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