Page 49 of Shadows of Justice

I smack him again and then shiver, the room as cold as a morgue. He notices and grabs the blanket that I discarded, wrapping me in its warmth. He weaves our fingers together, and I trace one of the webbing scars that cover his hand with my thumb.

“How did you get these?”

He smiles sheepishly. “Years of trial and error in experimentation. Most of it long before my feet hit American soil. I was a curious kid and only had old textbooks to try and interpret, no Google to answer my questions. My mother used to tease me, calling me el científico loco, or, the mad scientist.”

I laugh in disbelief, picturing an adolescent Leo fucking around with chemicals in a lab with test tubes and crazy hair.

“Maybe you are mad,” I say with a laugh, and he pinches my ass in punishment.

“I caught our house on fire a few times, but they say there’s no substitute for experience.”

I brush his hair back from his face and run my fingers through the soft strands. He closes his eyes, seeming to revel in my touch. “You’re not afraid of anything, are you?” I ask, my voice small. His eyes open, locking onto my gaze. There’s something there, something terrifying and life-altering, and it makes my heart race.

“That’s not true at all.”

We stay like that until I can’t help but fidget, breaking his stare to readjust the blanket. “You’re not tired?” I ask, clearing my throat.

“Insomnia,” he says with a shrug, turning back to his work.

“What are you putting in the bottles?” I ask, looking over his shoulder.

“It’s insulin. Without insurance, people pay around three hundred dollars a vial. You know twenty-six million people living in this country are uninsured?” He resumes filling the bottles with the syringe.

“No, I didn’t know that.”

“These are the same product and only twelve dollars per bottle. It covers my manufacturing costs but doesn’t turn a huge profit. I don’t mind. I’ve been selling to the same few buyers for almost a decade. I do it with medical grade nitroglycerin as well. There’s a huge need for both in Mexico, too.”

My brows shoot to my hairline. “That’s very . . . philanthropic of you,” I say. He shrugs, like its not a big deal. “You don’t deal in human organs do you?”

He looks to me, as if gauging if I’m kidding or not. I don’t know if I am, either.

“Not presently, no,” he says, smiling. “Too messy. I prefer my weapon deals with trusted military contacts, assisting with obtaining new identification, private investigator work, and providing encrypted emailing services on a secure server for a fee. Not everything done on the dark web is prostitution and harvested organs.”

“Well,” I say, smacking my lips. “Consider me enlightened.”

How is it that this kind-hearted man has ended up using his position to assist others from the shadows? It doesn’t seem real, like he’s going to quit pretending one day and I’ll uncover the real Leo.

The track changes to Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise as Leo gets back to his work. I shove off of the table and start wandering around the work spaces again, letting him finish.

I feel as though I don’t recognize this version of myself. I would have assumed that I’d be freaking out by now, but I have this overwhelming sense of calm that’s settled in my chest. I feel so at ease around Leo that I have to catch myself and remember where I am. And who we are.

I can’t help but wonder if he feels the same way.

My heart rate kicks up as I glance up from messing with a SAT phone and see his dark eyes on me from across the room. He elicits such palpable responses in me, my body completely at his mercy.

And, apparently, my mind.

I’ve spilled more about myself to him than I have with anyone, even those I’ve dated. It’s thrilling and also terrifying, having someone know such ugly and private things about you. I suppose that’s what true vulnerability feels like. Like home.

It makes my hands shake.

Alma mía, serás mi fin.

My breath catches as I feel warm arms surround me, folding me against a firm chest. I lean back and rest my head against his shoulder, eyes closed, and let myself just soak up the feeling for a moment.

“Your thoughts are spinning so fast that I’m getting dizzy over there,” Leo says against my hair. My eyes snap open, the warm fuzzies gone as quick as a candle snuffing out.

Remember who you are, Viv.

---