Page 118 of The Trophy

The wild parties and underage drinking are just the tip of this iceberg of debauchery however.

The hockey team in particular has been guilty of the behaviors that this blog has decided to out.

Hockey players inevitably attract puck bunnies.

What’s a puck bunny? many of you might ask. Let me enlighten you all on these desperate, dirty, immoral women who are also known as jersey chasers in other sports.

Hockey however is the worst and the puck bunny is a type of woman that puts us all in danger with her promiscuous behavior.

Women have come a long way after years of fighting to be heard, to be considered as more than a man’s accessory, a trophy that shines only depending on the man they can get.

Puck bunnies deny all of that, by targeting the hockey team and offering themselves and their bodies to our top athletes in the hopes of being seen by their sides. The players who have a chance to go professional, are particularly targeted by puck bunnies.

Why? you may ask.

Easy. Marrying a professional hockey player would mean a life of luxury and being under the spotlight for many of these gold diggers.

And today, I want to out to you the worst of those puck bunnies, the biggest gold digger our school has ever seen.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Lakyn Woods.

You might not know who she is, she completely disappears behind big glasses and baggy clothes at the library where she works part time.

However, Lakyn has a more popular twin sister everyone knows at school. Her sister is none other than the president of one of our campus most prestigious sorority, Zeta Theta Beta.

So you know who I’m talking about now? Blonde, bitchy and dating the president of Gamma Delta Tau and center of our hockey team?

But we aren’t here to talk about the popular one.

This little nerdy mouse had quite the transformation this year and with her new look, she didn’t turn into a butterfly; she turned into a different animal, the ultimate puck bunny.

You might think I’m being cruel, you might even root for Lakyn after you’ve seen her on the arm of our most eligible player, the hockey team captain, Prince Luca Leighton-Rossi.

One hockey player a bunny doesn’t make, am I right?

And how on earth any woman wouldn’t be satisfied with a stud like Prince Luca? From his golden god good lucks, to the crown promised to the one who’ll manage to secure a ring on her finger—after what I’m sure will be a very rewarding pro career—to a cock piercing that promises an enhanced performance in the bedroom, Luca is the total package. Every girl’s dream, right?

Wrong.

Because Lakyn didn’t stop at Luca.

This little, dirty bunny is also fucking the gorgeous goalie of our team, Cash Hanbury and our right winger and enforcer Blaze Dunne.

Do you still think that I’m being vicious? That all Lakyn did was go on three auction dates with the three heartthrobs hockey players and then selected the most eligible bachelor among the three hockey gods?

You’d be wrong, because it turns out that a pierced royal cock isn’t enough for this slutty puck bunny.

She’s fucking all three men and has convinced them to share her in and out of the bedroom.

Three times the dick, three times the fame, three times the paychecks.

I tip my hat to you, Lakyn Woods.

Every girl on campus and in the country has something to learn from you.

Too bad that women like you are the reason why our gender gets a bad name. Shame on you.

You might feel at the top of your game right now, but do you really think those three will be happy to share forever?

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