Page 96 of The Pact

I’m frozen in my spot, conflicted about what to do and about how I should feel. I know this conversation isn’t meant for my ears but I want to know what else Ausra has been hiding. I’m mad at her for lying but I understand why she did when her father tells her about my thing with Dad’s secretary. While that’s something I bragged about with my friends, I didn’t want Ausra to know. I was afraid of how she’d judge me. So maybe I can understand why she didn’t tell us who she was when we didn’t recognize her.

My conviction that she didn’t lie with a malicious intention is confirmed when she refuses to use me to get to my father.

Then he puts his hands on her. On my fucking girl.

By her reaction it’s clear that she doesn’t want to be touched. I take a step forward, leaving my hiding spot with my fingers clenched so tightly around the drinks I’m carrying that I’m surprised the glass doesn’t shatter. “Is everything ok, Ausra? Is this man bothering you?” I’m barely hanging onto my temper. If he doesn’t take his hands off of her, I don’t care my parents are throwing a party, I don’t give a fuck about making a scene. I don’t even care that he’s her father. If he touches her when she clearly doesn’t want him to, I’m going to make him regret it.

But Harold Winthrop isn’t stupid. You don’t make a ton of money and become a cult leader by being an idiot. He takes a step back.

The smile on his face says he isn’t scared of me but the way his hands are slightly shaking tells a completely different story. “I’m going to go back to the party. I’ll see you at the interview, Ausra. Think about what I just said.”

I keep my eyes on his as he walks away and once I’m sure we’re alone I turn to look at Ausra.

She seems to relax when her father walks away but only a little. There’s still tension in her shoulders.

Neither of us talks for a long moment. We look at each other and I don’t like what I see in her eyes. It’s like she’s scared, as if she were debating if she should bolt. I hate the feeling that I might be part of what put that fear in her eyes.

We speak at the same time.

“Ausra—”

“How long were you standing there?”

There’s a beat of silence, I only speak when I’m sure she isn’t going to say anything. “Long enough.”

Her eyes widen and then she bolts. She moves quickly running past me, entering the ballroom from the same door we came out from.

I don’t hesitate to follow her. She slows her pace in the crowded room so as not to draw attention and I do the same but I follow her out into the foyer and out of the front door.

Her heels make a clicking noise on the stone paved driveway.

“Ausra, wait!” Shit! She’s in high heels and I’m over a foot taller than her and yet she’s moving so fast that I struggle to keep up. She’s running toward the front gate. “Ausra! Where the fuck are you going?” I pant as I run past her and turn around, putting myself between her body and the gate.

The party is in full swing and it’s still too early for anyone to leave, so the driveway is deserted aside from several parked vehicles.

“Home,” she offers in a winded breath.

“Home where? To your apartment or to your father’s?”

She recoils as if I’d hit her. “I’ll never go back to my father’s house,” she spits out, her voice trembling with disdain and with the clear effort to keep from crying.

“Then why are you going? I thought we agreed that you’d stay over. What’s changed?”

She looks at me as if I were crazy. “What’s changed? Everything changed, Ash. You know that I lied. And I don’t even have to look at you to know how disgusted you are about me. All I have to do is to look into your eyes. But I can’t, it hurts too much. I knew this would happen. I just regret that I was too chicken to come clean and that you had to hear it from him. I swear I was looking for the right time to tell you but it never came. I liked the way you and the others looked at me and I didn’t want it to end.”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Why should it end? You’re the preacher’s daughter, so what? Why should that matter? You decided that we wouldn’t want you anymore if we knew? What gives you the right to make that decision without giving us a chance to prove you wrong?”

She lowers her gaze and I hate the defeat in her tone. “Because I heard you that day at school. Right before my dad kicked me out. You thought I was ugly and unfuckable.”

Oh, that.

I grab her by her biceps, doing my best not to hurt her but keeping her from running from me. “Ausra, please look at me. It hurts that you didn’t tell us but I understand why. And I’m so fucking sorry. We were being assholes. I have no other justification than that. For what it’s worth, I thought that you’d look pretty with your hair down and—”

“Without the glasses and the baggy clothes and maybe some makeup? Like your father’s secretary?”

Fuck! I sound disgusting even to my own ears. “I can’t believe I ever said that. I understand why you lied now. You didn’t want to be judged by the way he forced you to look.”

Her gaze is fixed on the ground. “Ausra, I’m not proud of the way we treated you. Of the way everyone treated you at school. And I’m not proud about Dad’s secretary, just in case you were wondering. I found out he was cheating on Mom and I wanted to hurt him. So I fucked her and then I began bragging about it because I wanted him to know what I did.”

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