Page 15 of His Girl of the Summer

“After the hell you gave me to get me to let you go with me, you're really going to ask me to stay behind now?” I want to keep the anger out of my voice, but in the back of my head, all I can think about is maybe she's embarrassed of me. I wince at the thought and have to know. I need to know now if she is embarrassed because if she is, she might as well ride back to Georgia with my heart in tow and stay there. I won't be with someone who isn't all in. I know what I want now, and it's not to hide. So instead of worrying about it for the rest of my damn life, I decide to ask her straight out.

“Are you embarrassed of me? Is that why you don't want me going with you?” I can't look at her. Voicing my fear is enough, but I can't make eye contact. Instead, I stare out of the window.

“What!? Of course not, Kas!” she says, jumping from her chair and rushing over to me. “Look at me, baby.” She uses her hands to turn my face in her direction.

“If I was embarrassed by anyone, it wouldn’t be you. I would be proud to introduce you to them, but it's them who I’m embarrassed by. The main reason I said I should go by myself was actually because you couldn't get off work. With Mitch hurting his hip, Tony can't afford to lose you right now. Harper is leaving tomorrow. I figured I could ride back with her, say goodby to my parents, pack up my bags and car, and head home to you. We have a lot of things to prepare for before you start back at school.” She smiles at me, and I relax completely. Knowing she wants me to go makes this easier, and knowing she's also right about the diner kills me. I’m already worried about Tony and the diner when I head back to school, but he told me he's looking to hire another cook. As long as I can finish out the summer, he should be good. Still, I sigh, not liking the idea of her leaving.

“Fine. I get it, I really do, but I still don't like it. I should be there to help you pack and move all your heavy shit,” I tell her, making her laugh. “I don't know that I’ll be able to sleep without you in my arms.”

“I’m going to miss you so much,” Charli says, tearing up. I hold her close for a little longer before deciding to call it an early night and take her to bed.

This time, I take it slow; I cherish her body, and she lets me, soaking up every moment of praise and adoration I pour onto and into her. She knows this will be our last night together for a while, and we both need this connection.

The next day comes all too soon, and before I know it, I’m standing there with Charli in my arms as she and Harper get ready to set out. I want to hold her forever, and as I look over her head and see my best friend, I see that same heartbreak and thought in his eyes. I give him a nod in sympathy, and we pull back from the girls. I hear Harper sobbing but don't take my eyes off Charli. I wipe a tear from her cheek before leaning down and kissing her softly.

“Come home to me,” I whisper against her lips.

“Always,” she says before turning and rushing to the car. I understand why she’s doing it. If she stays much longer, I don't think I'll be able to let her go. As we watch them drive away, I feel my heart nearly break for the second time this summer.

“Fuck!” Grayson shouts as we watch our girls drive away again. I just nod my head in agreement. I know this is harder on him. It could be months before he sees Harper again. At Least this time, I know she's coming back. Or I at least hope she is. The thoughts flood in the longer we stand here and watch.

What if this was all her way of getting away clean and free? What if she really didn't want to hurt my feelings? Or worse, what if she gets back home and her parents talk her into staying? They could convince her how stupid of an idea it would be to throw her college career away to run away and live with some guys. It sounds irresponsible. If Charli was in the least bit interested in her studies or wanted to get her degree in law, I would never ask her to move. Hell, I would move to her and figure my life out, but I want her to go to art school. To draw for the rest of our days if that makes her happy.

“Want to meet up with the guys? I need something to take my mind off this shitty ass day.” Grayson asks. I shrug, not really feeling up to being around people, but what’s worse than that is returning home.

Returning to our little studio apartment has seemed like a paradise since the last box was taken out. Now, without Charli, it seems more like an empty space full of bittersweet memories, kind of like my heart.

Chapter Eleven

Charli

On the ride home, I told Harper my plans were to skip school and go back to Kas. She was upset at first. I think she’s more or less scared of taking on college alone since I won't be there. After she got over her sadness, she told me she understood. That if she were in my shoes, she would do the same. Especially after I mentioned the art school opportunity. She was all for it then. Though I could still see the lingering sadness in her eyes.

“I’m going to miss you. It's always been you and me. What am I going to do without you?”

“I’ll see you every time you visit Grayson, and I promise to come home as much as I can. This is just what my heart is telling me I need to do. I’ve lived in a cold and empty house my whole life. The only reason I was in school was to make two people proud of me who couldn't care less if I was there or not. For the first time, I feel the warmth of someone loving me with their whole being. That is where I belong… with Kas.” After the tears stopped rolling down her eyes, she gave me a small smile and a nod of understanding.

“I’m so happy for you, Charli. You deserve that love, and I hate that you've gone this whole time without knowing what it truly felt like. You hold on to Kas with your whole being. You belong together.”

After that, the rest of the ride home was pretty silent. We talked a bit about our summer but were too sad to fake a conversation. We just neither had the energy. We stopped twice, mainly talking to the guys on the phone, crying some more, getting gas, and then getting back on the road.

As we pull up to town, Harper seems as sad to see the city limits as I am.

“How can it go from being the only home we’ve ever known, to feeling like a prison keeping me away from where I truly belong?” she asks softly.

“Like a prison keeping you trapped from where your heart truly desires,” I say just as softly. I don't tell her this town has always felt like a prison. I can't wait to get my stuff and get the hell out of dodge.

It doesn't take long to get to my house, and I dread opening the car door and walking through the obnoxious space that is my parents' home. I'm wondering what they are going to say. For once, will they even care that I was gone for months? I haven't reached out to them at all this summer. Maybe this time, they will have noticed. I take a deep breath and walk in. I hear soft words coming from the kitchen, so I make my way toward them. Taking one more deep breath, I push open the swinging door to the kitchen. The first thing I notice is both my mother and father at the kitchen table. As always, Mom has files piled in front of her, and Dad has a computer. I wait for them to notice me, but of course, they don't. I have to clear my throat three times, loudly, before they even look up. My mother barely spares me a glance before her eyes return to her tasks on the kitchen table. My father at least looks up and speaks, but what comes out of his mouth has my heart breaking in two.

“Oh, Charlette, you're back?” My dad smiles, but his eyes don't leave his computer. My breath catches. Wait, did they really notice I wasn't here? They might have actually missed my presence? My hopes and dreams are crushed in the next moment at my mother's voice.

“How was class? Didn't you have a test today?”

My heart shatters. Tears well in my eyes, and for the first time, I don't wipe them away. I don't try to hide behind a yes ma’am, no sir, or fake smile. This time, I don't stop the sob that releases from my throat.

“You don't really care, do you? Either of you?” I ask, again receiving not even a glance.

“About what, Charlette? Your test? I just asked, didn't I?” my mother says. My full name again. I’ve never heard her call me any other name. Not a darling, baby, dear, nothing. Just cold, impersonal, Charlotte.

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