Page 3 of Fool's Gold

Her voice is a soothing balm but not enough to combat the demons in my head. They feast on my insecurities, on my fears, and on the part of me that wants to curl up in a little ball and demand an answer as to why life seemed to shit on me lately.

I lost my parents. I lost Marcus. And if these stories continue, then I’ll lose my reputation, too. What’s left when all of those things are gone?

“Not right now. I need a little time to settle in and…” I trail off. “Get back to myself. What do you think of these articles?”

River draws in a deep breath and stays silent for a moment. “I think they’re not really helping you when you’re in this kind of headspace. And if there was anything I could do to get the press to back off, I would. Want me to cause a scandal? I know a guy.”

“Of course you do.” And of course she’d try. She’s my best friend.

Hopefully she’s not going anywhere, either. Then I’d be entirely alone.

I shiver, a chill running down my spine, and I press the phone tight to my ear before hauling myself to my feet using the countertop for leverage.

The bungalow has been sealed up tight for too many months for the air to smell fresh.

“They’re nothing but flesh-eating vipers, Em,” River continues in my silence. “The sooner you put them out of your mind, the better. Maybe this is a chance for you to turn it around and get the vipers to bump your new movie. What do they always say? All press is good press.”

I trail from room to room and throw open the windows, muscling several of them when they stick. “All press might be good press, but now really isn’t the time for it.” I swallow over the tightness in the back of my throat, every muscle constricting.

God, please, no more puking. I’m not a pretty puker.

The breeze blowing off the ocean is fresh and slightly cool to combat the warmth of the sun. I throw open the windows in every room except my parents’ bedroom, leaving their door closed.

“Do you think he’s going to come for you? Hot Daddy Marcus.”

I groan, pain spiking through my head and all the way down through my torso. “Please stop calling him that.” Especially since I haven’t told River what he and I have done to, with, and for each other.

“What? He certainly comes across as a daddy type of energy in these pictures. Even though I know it’s not true,” she rushes to say. “He isn’t the kind of man to take advantage of a young woman, and you would have told me.”

Her voice is probing as though she might secretly believe I kept things from her. And I have.

River doesn’t have any idea what kind of man Marcus really is. Or how good he tastes. If I have my way, she’s never going to know. Some things need to stay private between a girl and her… no longer guardian, semi-uncle, dad’s best friend.

“Em?” River presses when I stay quiet.

I unpeel my lips from where they’ve pressed tightly together. “Yeah, I’m here. Sorry. I’m a little out of my mind.”

She clucks her tongue sympathetically. “And I’m sure I’m not helping you, asking these kinds of questions.”

“You talking to me is a help,” I answer honestly, stopping in the door to my bedroom and staring at the bed still made up from the last time we were here. “I have no clue what I’m going to do.”

And no idea if Marcus is going to come and get me or not. I actually want him to, I realize, even when it seems pathetic to want. Only because that will give me a chance to really explode on him. To erupt and let out every bit of anger and hurt I’ve repressed at finding out he signed the papers to release me from his guardianship.

Then again, I came out here to put some space between us and avoid his lying face. It’s probably for the best we keep our distance. Besides, if he signed the papers, he’s not worried about where I am.

He’s only worried about himself.

That’s not going to change.

The sooner I destroy whatever kind of fucked-up bond still makes me feel something for him, the better off I’ll be. Marcus can go sink in the ocean for all I care. Except the tears are back, because I really do care, and I’m terrified of getting hurt. Again.

TWO

Frantic nerves drive me out of my office to my apartment and everywhere Empire has ever haunted. The cafés and the spas. The shops on Rodeo and the galleries on the side streets.

Every new place that turns up nothing has my fingers curving over the steering wheel hard enough to crack the frame and my frustration mounting.

My teeth grind together.

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