Page 56 of All That Glitters

“Why do you think I’d want you to endure something like that?” I ask her slowly. No one should have to go through what she just did.

She’s shaking harder than a bee in a tornado.

“I know my career is important to you,” she whispers. “And you need me to finish this movie to keep things on track for you. I did it for you.”

It nearly breaks me to hear.

TWENTY-ONE

Marcus holds me while I clutch at him, our arms wrapped around each other. Soon enough, I’ll come down from this anxiety attack, but right now, it’s impossible to get myself under control. I’m not sure where I end and he begins. My fingers refuse to uncurl from the back of his shirt.

“Come on, Empire,” he speaks in a low, soft tone and eventually breaks away, nudging me toward the side of the car. “Let’s go home.”

“What about—” I start.

“I’ll send someone over to pick it up,” he says about the car.

The tears refuse to stop through the entire drive home. Marcus says nothing, his thunderous expression focused on the road ahead. He says nothing when we pull in front of the house, and I make a break for the front door. He says nothing for the rest of the day although he finds me on the couch, curls his body around mine, and sits with me, turning off the notifications on his phone for the next few hours.

He came for me.

He rescued me from a terrible situation and hadn’t made me feel like it was my own fault for letting it happen. Listening to the crunch of bone on bone when he broke Parker’s nose was the highlight of the day.

I’ll never forget it.

The next morning, true to his word, my car sits parked in the driveway beside his. I write out a note and slide it next to the espresso machine before heading out to a visit I’ve been putting off.

It’s hard enough to go to the cemetery on a normal day. It’s even harder to go now, after what happened with Marcus and Parker and filming. Being on set naked in front of everyone felt like the lowest part of my life until now, sitting in front of two handsomely carved headstones who used to be bright and shining stars in my life. Guiding lights, I always thought. No matter how far they traveled for work or whatever part they were throwing themselves into, my parents were there for me.

They would have been just as horrified as Marcus by what they found on set, I’m sure of it. Looking back on it in the light of day, what Parker asked me to do wasn’t right, and blaming my contract for the lack of precautions on set was a cop out.

From start to finish, he manipulated me, and everyone else on set went along with him.

If my parents had been alive—it never would have happened.

I settle on the bench in front of the graves with fresh flowers clutched in hand, waiting for something besides the numbness inside to make itself known. When nothing happens, I take a deep breath and force my eyes open.

Sitting in front of the headstones with the sun shining down on me now…my embarrassment and shame seems small.

Two lives are gone.

I needed the distance—from everything, everyone, and especially from Marcus.

“Hi Mom,” I say softly. “Hi Dad. How are you doing?” I purse my lips. “Silly, stupid question. You’re dead. You’re not doing anything at this point. I guess it’s just one of those normal things people say because it’s a habit. But wherever you are, I hope you’re happy and looking down on me.”

There’s never an answer or even a glimmer of sensation when I come here. It’s only a place to sit and reflect, surrounded by acres of stone and fake flowers from other people coming to pay their respects as well.

My parents are gone, and there isn’t any hope of them coming back again, not even to visit from beyond to let me know they’re okay. Or better: to assure me that I’ll be okay.

As upset as Mom would have been at Parker for the scene at the studio, she would have been singing praises for Marcus and the way he’d swooped in like a knight. The memory brings a smile to my face. He’s the bright light in the middle of so much upset.

And I’d fallen completely head over heels for him.

It isn’t anything new, either. It has been a long time coming.

“I’ve spent so much of my time mad at him, and now I wonder if both of us have been trying to outrun things we refuse to think about.” I gnaw on the inside of my cheek. “Neither one of us has treated the other one right. He’s been overbearing, and I’ve been stubborn, too caught up in trying to feel normal to act like it.”

I pause for a long moment and turn the bouquet of flowers in my hand. Yellow blossoms, red roses, and eucalyptus.

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