Page 55 of Whatever You Want

“How can I make this easier for you? Do you want me to leave?”

“No…yes.” I blew out a breath, wishing I could bang my head up against a wall. “I don’t know.”

Hurt flashed in his eyes, but he recovered quickly. “I’ll do whatever you want me to do.”

“Maybe you could run an errand, just to give me enough time to tell him about us.”

“And where do you suggest I go?” he asked in disbelief. He wasn’t very happy, and that made me feel ten times worse.

I chewed on my bottom lip, trying to think of something that would keep him busy. “How about the carwash?”

“The carwash?” He raised a brow. “My truck is already cleaned. I washed it yesterday in my own damn driveway.”

“Well, my Nissan is filthy. Come on.” I wrapped my arms around his neck. I hated this, and if I didn’t think he would be okay with this, I wouldn’t have suggested it.

He sighed and leaned his forehead against mine. “I understand why you want to handle things this way, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“I’m not hiding us, I promise.” His face filled with understanding, but I still felt so damn guilty. I wanted to kick something.

“I know.” He looked away, unable to meet my eyes. “This just feels like a setback.”

“It’s not. And if you’re not comfortable with leaving, then stay. Jeremey’s feelings are not more important than yours. I’m sorry if I made you feel that they were.”

He kissed me briefly before gathering his keys and wallet off the table. “Brina and I will go for a drive. We will come back later.”

“No, let her stay, and you don’t have to go far. Just give me a few minutes alone with him.”

He walked out the door without another word. He was right, this did feel like a setback, and I was already regretting asking him to leave. I didn’t even have to question my decision because I already knew I made the wrong one.

Jeremy’s thirty-minute drive seemed to take forever. I tried calling Logan multiple times, but he refused to pick up. I sent him a dozen text messages pleading with him to come back, but they’ve all gone unanswered. I had a feeling I’d be doing a good amount of groveling when he returned.

I was pacing around my house when the doorbell rang. I took one last look around, making sure everything was put away. This would be the first time I’ve seen Jeremey since the funeral, and I didn’t want things to be awkward.

I swung the door open, and a familiar face smiled down at me. “Well, hello there, stranger.” He pulled me into a hug, wrapping his strong arms around me. I hadn’t realized how much I missed him until now. He reminded me of happier times. When life was easier and a hell of a lot less complicated.

“It’s good to see you.” I smiled, noticing he was still in his captain’s uniform. I patted his chest playfully. “I see you’re still giving those flight attendants something good to look at.” His hair was a little shorter than usual, and it looked like he had filled out a bit. He looked good, but he already knew that.

He grinned. “Don’t forget the female passengers on the flights too.”

I stood off to the side. “Get in here, Romeo.”

He held me out at arm’s-length. “You look great, Ava. I’m sorry for the short notice. I wasn’t sure I was going to have time, and I didn’t want to make any promises.”

I held the door open for him. “How long is your layover?”

He looked at his watch. “I have about an hour or two to spare.”

“Jeremy, now I feel terrible. Did you have to rent a car too?” I glanced outside to the small black sedan in front of my house.

He flashed me that pearly white smile that pretty much got him whatever he wanted. “Yes, but it was worth it because I get to see two of my favorite girls.” He glanced over his shoulder to where Madison and Brina were playing hopscotch. “Although one has already ditched me for a friend. Story of my life.” He dramatically rolled his eyes.

I touched his elbow gently, guiding him inside. “Come on in, I haven’t seen you in forever.”

“Wow, this place is a lot bigger than the pictures you sent.” His eyes scanned my living room, and I was glad I tidied up before he came.

“Let me give you a quick tour.” We took our time walking through the house, and I caught him up to speed on everything concerning Madison. If he noticed most of Drew’s things missing, he didn’t say a word. After showing him the inside, we headed out to the backyard and sat at the outdoor table. I kicked my feet up on the deck railing while he sipped his ice water.

“I’m sure Madison loves having an in-ground pool.”

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