Page 25 of Finding Limits

“It felt right,” she hits back, and when I raise my eyes to take a glance at her, seeing how hurt she looks makes me wanna throw my fist at the wall.

“Yeah, well, just because somethin’ feels right at the time, doesn’t make it okay. It ain’t proper for a man of my age to be lyin’ in a bed with a girl of yours.”

“Mitch, I’m…” She has to do some thinking on it. “I’m twenty-two years old. I’m not a child.”

“I never said you were, but if people knew we were sharin’ a bed, there would be talk of us?—”

“Liking each other.” She shocks me with how brash she’s being. There's sarcasm in the smile that seems to have overridden her panic. “I do like you, Mitch. I like the way I feel when I’m around you and I like the way it felt when I woke up this morning,” she admits, pulling back her shoulders and standing strong.

“This isn’t up for negotiation, Everleigh. The sleepin’ in the same bed thing has to stop.” I put my foot down and storm out the door when I see her confidence shrink and her bottom lip start to wobble.

I have an outhouse to fix up into a stable.

Iburst into tears as I watch him storm across the yard toward the shack on the other side of it. He must be angry because he kicks one of the rafters that’s holding up the roof and makes the whole thing collapse.

I’ve been going over and over this morning in my head, trying to think of what I did wrong, and now seeing him so angry because of me, makes me want to cry.

Fear creeps its way into my chest and grips its hold. I don’t know where we go from here because it doesn’t feel as if we can go back. Living in the bunker was hell, but at least there I knew who I belonged to.

Since I was rescued I’ve been nothing but a burden, first to the Souls and now to Mitch too.

I wipe away my tears as I stand and watch the man compose himself. Then I laugh a sad, bitter laugh that only a person who’s made a fool of themselves would know how to make.

I knew coming into this world that I’d be naïve to it, but how could I have thought that it was possible to have a future after what I endured? How did I picture a man wanting me after the damage that's been done, not just to my body, but inside my head?

I’m not pure of sin like Mitch thinks I am, my bones are riddled with it. My skin starts to itch when I think about the way Solomon used to touch me. I got through those times by telling myself that what he did to me was his way of sharing his love. He’d wanted me to be his, and what Addison did ruined that for him.

I knew I could never have loved Solomon, even if I was his wife. But I still took pity on him and what he lost.

Which is more than he ever did for me.

“You haven’t bled in weeks?” Solomon’s cock flops out of me and he stares at me with concern etched all over his face. I say nothing, just keep my eyes focused on the floor. He’s right, I haven’t bled for weeks and I know just as well as he does what that means.

“Everleigh, are you…”

“I think so,” I answer, holding back my tears and admitting what I haven't allowed my head to contemplate.

“That’s great news.” He scrambles toward me, placing his hands over my filthy nightdress so his palm can cradle my concave stomach. His reaction may be unwelcome, but it also gives me hope. Knowing that I carry his child now might make me valuable enough for him to consider talking to his father. This baby could be my salvation.

“A blessing.” I place my hand over his and forge a smile for him.

“A blessing, indeed.” His dreamy smile remains in place while my body turns cold.

Mitch says nothing when he steps back inside the cabin a few hours later, and I take my journal and slide it under the cushion beside me. There’s tension between us now and I hate it. More than anything, I hate the uncertainty of everything.

“What did I do wrong? At least tell me that.” My voice comes out desperate and weak but I don’t care. I need answers.

Mitch turns his head to look at me and all the harshness on his face fades when he sighs a long, heavy breath.

“You did nothin’ wrong, nothin’ at all. It was me who fucked up.”

“How?” I shake my head, hoping he’ll help me understand.

“By lettin’ myself get carried away and wantin’ somethin’ I can’t have.” He comes toward me and crouches in front of me. “Everleigh, you're beautiful, and you're sweet, and despite everythin’ you’ve been through there ain’t nothin’ but good in you.”

“I know what you’re gonna say but?—”

“No, ya don’t.” He shakes his head and takes my hand in his. “I’m old, I’m stuck in my ways and I’ve found my place on this Earth to call home. You're young, you got a whole world out there to explore. You need to find your home, and I wanna make you better so you can do that?—”

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