Page 72 of Raze

I’ve only filled in one of the clues when Trinity and two of her cronies walk into the clubhouse. All of them are clearly dressed for attention, which is ironic since there's no one here to give it to them.

“Sorry, they’re all gone to the fundraiser,” I inform them, continuing to write my answer in the grid.

“We know, we’re going too.” Trinity looks pleased with herself.

“No, you can’t.” I stand up, suddenly feeling furious.

“And why not? Raze wants to show off how great the club is, and some might say we’re its best asset.” I wanna swipe the smarmy smile off her face. She’s already had to put on layers of make-up to hide the damage I’ve done to her face, but I keep my cool because I’m outnumbered, and I’d hate Raze to have to come home because I got into a fight.

“You can’t show up at that fundraiser, especially not dressed like that. Raze is trying to change what people think about the club, he’s trying to earn their respect so they trust he can protect them. You turning up and getting the wrong attention is gonna undo all that. If you want to go, fine, but please get changed.” I try the nice approach.

“Go screw yourself.” She twists her middle finger up at me, before helping herself to a bottle of vodka from behind the bar and leading her skanks out the door.

“Shit” I sigh, wondering what I can do.

It’s pointless me calling Raze while he’s riding so I try Alicia instead and when her call goes straight to voicemail, I head out the door and across the yard to try and find Griller.

I’m not entirely sure which of the rooms at the motel is his, but I follow the sound of the loud, heavy metal music and try that door first. When no one answers, I figure it’s due to the volume of the music, so I twist the handle and let myself in.

Griller doesn’t hear me come in, he looks too busy, hunched over a desk in the corner of the room and focused on whatever it is that he’s working on. I slowly approach him and as I look over his shoulder, I’m shocked by what I see.

“Griller that’s…beauti–” He spins round with his fist raised and when he realizes it’s me he quickly drops it and cuts the music.

“Jesus Christ, what the fuck ya think ya doin’ creepin’ up on a man like that?” He holds his hand to his chest as if I just gave him a heart attack.

“I wasn’t creeping up on you. I knocked, you just didn’t hear,” I point out.

“Well, what do you want?” He looks mad at me and kinda scary now that I’m standing so close, but what I see etched on the pad resting on his desk makes it hard for me to fear him.

“You drew that?” I nod my head towards the sketch of Alicia. The pencil strokes are soft and feathery, and a total contradiction to the rough and edgy man standing over me.

“Yeah, I drew it, and what?” He gets all defensive.

“It’s pretty.” I lift up the sketch pad and realize it’s not the only one when I flick through the pages.

It seems Griller has an entire notebook of sketches, all of the girl who’s rapidly becoming my best friend.

“Of course it’s pretty, it’s of her.” He snatches it out of my hand looking embarrassed.

“You really like her don’t you?” I sit myself on the faded, ripped couch that’s beside his desk, and suddenly feel sorry for him.

“It don’t matter how much I like her, it’s not gonna change anythin’.”

“You mean the whole dating a member’s female relative rule? Look I’m sure if you spoke to Saul–”

“You think I’m worried about a stupid club rule?” he snaps back at me, slumping into the seat beside me and flicking through the pictures of her. Some are close up, some are distant, there's one of just her hand holding a deal of cards and I’m still stunned at how talented he is.

“She’d never feel the same way about me. I weren’t much of a looker before your boyfriend turned me into Cyclops.” He surprises me when he laughs even if it does sound sad. “Look at her, she’s perfect. And everyone around here knows it ain’t me she’s got those pretty hazel eyes on.”

“Well, she can’t think you're all that bad, she told me what happened between you guys a few weeks ago.” I nudge him and smile.

“What, when she was drunk out of her skull and depressed that Vike wasn’t noticin’ her? I shouldn’t have taken advantage of her like that but she was right there in my fuckin’ hands.” He looks disappointed with himself and I’m still getting to grips with this new side of him.

“Have you tried talking to her about this?” I question when he slams the book shut.

“And what use would that be? All I’d be doing is humiliatin’ myself. A girl like her would never go for a guy like me.”

“And how do you know that if you're not man enough to tell her how you feel?” I stare at him. “Griller, I’ve been in this room for five minutes and you’ve shown me a completely different side of yourself. You're not the man who walks around out there being an asshole to everyone. Maybe you should introduce her to this guy.”

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