Page 122 of Kings Don't Break
How can I be optimistic when I’ve once again brought trouble to his life?
I involved him from the moment I turned up on his doorstep battered and broken…
Blake would scold me even more than Mama if he knew about these thoughts. He’d insist he regrets nothing even as he sits in a jail cell. That makes the situation worse. Intensifies the guilt that’s anchored inside me.
“He loves you, baby,” Mama says softly. I look up in surprise, blinking as if it’ll help me hear better. Mama simply smiles and covers one of my hands with hers. “You know that, right, baby? Blake Cash is in love with you. And when a man loves you—a real man, not that big bully you married—he’ll sacrifice anything for you.”
A choked sound leaves me. Half gasp, half disbelieving scoff. “Mama, it’s complicated.”
“No, it’s not. It’s love. Just about the purest, least complicated thing in the world. The man loves you. So he did what he had to do to protect you. Now you show you love him by supporting him. Don’t look at me like that—I know when my baby’s in love. Hell, I knew when you were twelve and in tears ’cuz you didn’t want him to think any different of you ’cuz you got your period.”
“Mama,” I groan. “How are you just as embarrassing about it now as you were then?”
“It’s my job.”
The guilt recedes, if only slightly. Enough for me to break in a slight smile. “I care about Blake… so much. I don’t want to be the reason his life’s ruined.”
“It won’t be, baby. It’ll work out. Trust an old biddy like me. I know a thing or two even if I forget sometimes.” She pats my hand, then lays her head back against her stack of hospital bed pillows. Her eyes close and a serene expression washes over her face. “Just don’t forget to get married and have a few babies before I’m gone. I want to be around to see it.”
I shake my head, puzzled. “I can’t conceive. You know that.”
“I know you couldn’t with that man. Which tells me he was all wrong for you. Whereas my golden boy is all right for you. It’ll be different, baby.”
I don’t bother arguing with Mama. I kiss her on the brow and promise I’ll be back soon. On my way out, I stop by the nurses’ station to chat with the nurse on shift that’s overseeing her care.
When I’m sure I’ve won her over, I slip in another request…
“I was wondering if you could provide me the room number of another patient,” I say a few minutes into our conversation. I flash her a friendly smile. “He’s my husband, but due to all the commotion lately, we’ve been separated. His name’s Kenneth Stricklin.”
All I have to do is flash my ID card with my last name and she’s providing me his exact floor and room number.
I ride the elevator up, my insides a topsy-turvy mess of nerves, but also another sensation altogether—the sharp, prodding determination for revenge.
Ken’s room is quiet and unguarded when I walk up. I push open the door and slip inside. The blinds are shuttered close, allowing for shadows to edge around the corners of the room. I ease closer to the bed where Ken lays pale and despondent.
His face still bores all the evidence of the confrontation from a couple days ago. Swollen flesh. Purple and blue bruises. Widespread gashes.
There’s a thick bandage around his brow, from where I presume the gunshot wound is. He’d tried to shoot himself only for the bullet to miss. It cracked his skull but otherwise caused no other damage. He’s survived.
I don’t stop ’til I’m at his bedside and he’s looking over. His cold gray eyes flicker with surprise; he was expecting anyone but me to turn up.
I stare down at him, my expression grave but otherwise unreadable. On the inside, the nerves have fluttered away to make space for the sheer contempt that sweeps in. I’m staring at the man who spent years making my life a living hell.
The man who beat me repeatedly, who tormented me, who thought so little of me he crushed me to the point I no longer existed.
It would be so easy to just… end him.
In this moment, when we’re alone and nobody’s watching. I could grab a pillow and snuff the life out of him.
Just like he did to me… slowly over time…
“Kor,” he chokes out. His eyes water. “I knew you’d come. I knew you’d seek me out. Kor, you’re my wife. Anything I’ve done was for you… for us...”
“I want nothing but the worst for you.”
His brows knit. “W-what?”
“You made my life a living hell. You almost destroyed me. You sure as hell tried your hardest to break me. For so long, I thought you did.”
