Page 46 of The Wages of Sin

“Only because I had to be,” I argued. “There was no other choice.”

“There’s always another choice,” he countered. “You could have given up. You could have turned your back on your past and stopped caring about anyone else. You could have become bitter and jaded. But you didn’t. Do you have any idea how amazing that is, Kiera? How rare?”

I shook my head.

He leaned in closer. “Do you know why I insisted Jane send you alone that second week?”

“Because you wanted to sleep with me?” I guessed.

A hint of a wicked smile lifted his lips.

“If all I’d wanted was to fuck you, I could have done that the first day we met,” he said with all the confidence in the world. “Don’t lie to yourself and pretend otherwise.”

There was no point denying it. I was almost embarrassed remembering how hungrily I’d stared at his naked body.

“So why didn’t you seduce me then and there?” I asked.

“Because I wanted more,” he said. “I wanted you near me. I wanted you walking around my home week after week—talking, singing, making this place feel alive.”

“I—I don’t understand.”

His gaze slid from mine. It seemed unlikely, but he almost seemed uncomfortable.

He raised his glass and downed the rest of his drink in one swallow before looking back at me.

“No one has ever looked at me the way you do, Kiera,” he said. “Usually, when I look into someone’s eyes, all I see is fear or anger. Sometimes, there’s disgust or a perverse attraction to danger. But you’re different. Besides my brothers, you’re the only one who looks at me like I’m a real person.”

My brows pulled down, bunching together in confusion. “Of course, you’re a person. What else would you be?”

“A monster,” he answered without hesitation.

Maybe it was the dark room or the late hour, but his words struck me as almost comically dramatic.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “I know monsters. I watched one kill my sister. I had to fight one off with a bowling trophy the other day. You’re definitely not a monster.”

“You’d change your mind if you knew me better.”

“I’m not saying you’re an angel,” I said. “I’m not naive. I’ve seen your scars, and I’ve worked enough emergency room shifts to guess you didn’t get them helping little old ladies cross the street. I may not know every crime you’ve committed, but I’ve seen the good you do. And that good proves there’s more to you—much more.”

“You’re the only person in the world who would use that word to describe me.”

I shook my head, unwilling to believe that.

“I’m just telling you what I know. Monsters don’t come rushing to the aid of people they barely know—good people do. Monsters don’t put themselves at risk to help someone in danger,” I said before laughing to lighten the mood. “And they sure as hell don’t tip as well as you.”

He raised his hand and gently caressed the back of his fingers down my cheeks.

“That right there is what I mean,” he said, looking deep into my eyes. Brutal honesty dripped from every word he spoke. “No one sees me the way you do. When you look at me, I feel like I’m more than the acts I’ve committed. No one else has made me feel as alive, as human, as you, Kiera, and that’s how I know no other woman could ever tempt me again.”

I blinked, uncertain of how to respond. My heart was pounding, my chest full to bursting with emotions I didn’t know how to put words to.

So I didn’t try.

Instead, I leaned forward and kissed him, letting my lips and tongue and body express what my voice couldn’t.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and drew him toward me, needing him close. He didn’t fight the pull. In an instant, he let the crystal tumbler fall from his hand and clatter against the floor.

He didn’t waste any time, pulling off his jacket as he moved onto the couch. I did my best to help, my hands furiously working to undo the buttons on his shirt as he angled himself over me. Nudging his knees between mine, he pushed my legs open, making room for his hips between my thighs.

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